Category Archives: Child Support

Child Support, divorce, General Legal, Marriage, Property Division

The Top 5 Lies of Divorce Clients

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There is an old lawyer joke… How do you tell when your client is lying to you?  When their lips are moving.  Lying to your lawyer is a really bad idea for multiple reasons.  It is primarily bad because advice can change based on the facts of your circumstance and if we, as the lawyer, do not know the facts our advice may not be right.  And the whole perjury thing is bad too.  Without further ado, here are the top 5 lies that clients tell.

  • 5.  Lies about Income.  
  • Clients that make a lot of money often understate their income.  Also, I have had clients say they make more than they do, I guess because of embarrassment.  It is a really bad idea to lie about income regardless of the reason.  The other party has the right to get pay records directly from your bank or employer and lying about making more than you do can result in you paying more than you owe.
  • 4.  Lies about their role within the Home.  
  • The husband comes in and says he does all of the cooking, cleaning, child rearing and otherwise paints himself as Martha Stewart, when he is more like Haagar the Horrible.  Out pillaging, but not big on household chores.  This matters because it effects the division of assets and has custody and alimony applications.
  • 3.  Lies about Other Marital Fault.
  • #3 is other marital fault because it is saving room for #1.  But this means that the client tells you about how awful the other party was.  How they were attacked or provoked and only reacted and defended themselves.  They “forgot” to mention the domestic violence conviction and the meth lab in the garage.  Oops.
  • 2.  Lies about Value$.
  • In a similar vein to lies about income, clients understate the value of investments, collectibles and businesses.  This can be very significant and a husband that misled the Court about the value of his privately owned business resulted in the wife coming back after the fact and getting more value when he had a falling out with a business partner.  Also, that 1953 Chevrolet Coupe is worth more than you are saying it is.
  • 1.  Lies about Adultery.
  • #1 for a reason.  It’s hard to admit when you are wrong.  By the way, “I didn’t have an affair, it was just a one-night stand,” is still an affair. It is adultery.  Lying about this can bumfoozle a legal strategy of trying to prevent the divorce.   If the other party has grounds against you and wants a divorce they can get it.  If you lie about it chances are you will eventually be caught.

These are just some of the lies told everyday.  It is important to tell your lawyer the truth, including the dirty details. It can make a difference in your case.

Matthew Thompson is a Divorce Attorney in Mississippi and encourages potential clients to tell your lawyer the truth!

Follow the blog:#BowTieLawyer 

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Child Custody, Child Support, Crime, divorce, General Legal, Opinion

Know Your Rights! Get a diagnosis.

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This blog is inspired by the many, many folks I encounter on a weekly basis who have “no clue” what their rights are.

  • If you’re ill, you go to the doctor to get a check-up.

  • If your car is squeaking, you go to the mechanic.

  • If your roof is leaking, you call the repair man.

But if you think you are in a legal situation, what do you do?  YOU IGNORE IT!

Do NOT ignore it.  Go see an attorney.  They don’t bite.  We’ve already discussed how to determine if you need one (here) and how to find one (here).  This is just aimed at the folks on the fence and those choosing to be blissfully ignorant.  Not knowing your rights, not knowing the law, and not knowing your options is a bad thing.

There are deadlines, timelines, and statutes of limitation.  Memories fail, people forget or misremember, documents get lost, people get lost, and “witnesses” die.  Records get erased, deleted and shredded.  Bruises and wounds heal, scars fade, and most persons recall times past more fondly (or at least not as bad) than they were.

Get off the fence.  Get informed and know your rights.

Thompson Law Firm, pllc    Matthew@BowTieLawyer.ms    (601) 850-8000

Child Custody, Child Support, divorce, Irreconcilable differences, Opinion

From No Fault to Yo’ Fault

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The clever title to this blog was proposed by an attorney friend of mine that handles some family law matters, but practices extensively in other areas of law.

We were recently discussing how “No Fault” cases get derailed.  While Mississippi is technically not a true “No Fault” state, there are provisions for an Irreconcilable Differences divorce.  (commonly referred to as “No Fault,” blogged prior.)

We were discussing what gets them off track.  The parties, after getting over the initial shock of divorce, decide they will be adults and agree.  They think they can agree to the divorce and resolve their differences.   After all, they did manage to get along for 9 years, have two kids and bought a house.  What could go wrong?   Perhaps they searched online and looked at divorceyourself.com.  A very risky idea!

Well, the old adage that the devil is in the details is never truer than in divorce.  The No Fault idea gets derailed when the fellow realizes he will have to pay 20% of his income towards child support, plus health insurance and alimony. Yikes!  He realizes it’s cheaper to keep her.  (sorry for the cliché)  The wife gets squirrely when she realizes that her half of the retirement account is consumed by balancing the equity in the house, or that the money she gets cannot be realized without significant tax consequences.

Parties to a divorce don’t realize child support is until 21, not 18 in Mississippi.  They don’t know the types of custody, or what that means.  They agree to things that they cannot legally agree  to and fail to consider the consequences.  They agree to “legal terms” that do not exist in Mississippi law, because they saw it online.  And lastly, one of them is finally convinced to see an attorney by a close friend or family member and when they do and realize the consequences of what they were about to do and back out, the other side becomes angry and backs out too.  All of a sudden an easy deal becomes complicated, expensive and adversarial.

Want to keep your situation from going from No Fault to Yo’ Fault?  Do your homework, have an assessment with an attorney that practices family law, keep the peace, and be smart.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney that can handle your divorce whether it’s your fault, their fault, or somebody else’s.  Trust the Bow Tie.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer

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Child Custody, Child Support, divorce, Modifications

Deposition Imposition; What is a Deposition?

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Depositions are routinely taken in lawsuits, and are common in family law cases.  A deposition is a part of the “discovery” process where the parties or a witness are asked questions, under oath, outside of Court, so that the attorney will know what they will say when in Court.  You have heard the old maxim that an attorney should never ask a question that he doesn’t know the answer to, well the deposition is the mechanism where you can ask that question.  A wide variety of questions may be asked in the depositions even those that likely would not be relevant in Court.

Depositions are usually at the attorney’s office. The attorneys, the parties and a Court reporter are typically the only persons in attendance.  Depositions are transcribed and may be videotaped.

Questions about the witnesses education, work, finances and efforts with regards to the children are all fair game.  The dirty details of fault are also fair game. Naming names and being specific are part of the process too.  Depositions are a tool to gain information as well as pin witnesses or parties down on what their “story” is so that it does not “change” later.

I had an instance where I took the father’s deposition in a custody modification case. Both parties had remarried.  Step-parents always have a bull’s eye on their backs in custody modification cases. I made sure and asked the father several times and different ways if he had any issues with step-dad.  The answer was “No.”  Well, it took several months to get to trial. At trial the father tried to change his tune.  He attempted to say he had serious issues with step-dad and had for as long as he had been in the picture. I asked the father if recalled his deposition. He stuttered. I showed him the specific page and questions asked. He said he must have forgotten about the serious issues at the time of the deposition. Right.  He backed off on his assertions and the deposition “saved” the day.

Objections are rare in family law depositions, or at least less common than in trial.  They are typically limited to the “form of the question,” being made to preserve the right to object in the future, but the deponent usually still answers the question.  Questions regarding crimes, however, can be objected to and those are usually not answered – with the deponent pleading the 5th.  The 5th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution gives all persons the right to not incriminate themselves.  How does this come into play in family law? Adultery is a crime in Mississippi (blogged previously).

The bottom line in depositions is, while they are nerve wracking for the deponent, ultimately you are just answering questions and your job is to tell the truth and rely on your attorney.

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Child Support, divorce

Financially Ever-After; Assets and Lies

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Financial issues abound in almost every divorce action.  The parties fight over the money, the debt, the house, the business and anything else of value.  The financial consequences of divorce can not be overstated.  It typically results in a change in lifestyle for both parties, and despite the law that contemplates “maintaining the lifestyle of which you have grown accustomed,” divorce frequently results in both parties living a reduced lifestyle. It takes more money to run two households than it does one.

Mississippi Courts use a form for financial disclosures. This form is called an “Eight-oh-Five,” as it is Rule 8.05 (clickable) which requires the completion and use of a financial statement in family law cases.  The 8.05 must list all income, assets, expenses and liabilities.  Whether they be “joint” or solely owned by one party, they have to be disclosed.  The 8.05 also must include a recent pay stub, work history and the most recent tax return.  These are to be completed under oath and are subject to perjury safeguards.

Persons who have submitted materially false 8.05s have been held accountable by the Court, even well after the fact.  In a recent, notable case the husband, who also had a girlfriend, won the lottery about 2 months before the divorce. He did not disclose the winnings and it was an out of state lottery so the wife did not hear about it.  The parties were divorced.  About 4 years later, the now ex-husband’s girlfriend called the ex-wife to let her know that the husband had won the lottery just prior to the divorce. Why?  Well, the girlfriend found out that the fellow was now cheating on her.  The ex-wife filed a petition to re-open the matter due to fraud.  The husband’s failure to disclose was found to be “fraud on the Court” and the case was re-opened. The wife was awarded a portion of the winnings and attorney fees.

Moral of the story; disclose your assets and be honest. The Court requires full disclosure.

Thompson Law Firm, PLLC      (601) 850-8000

Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

 

Child Custody, Child Support, divorce

Separation Preparation…

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First of all, there is no such thing as “Legal Separation” in Mississippi. The closest equivalent is a Temporary Order. This Order can either be the result of a temporary hearing or due to an agreement of the parties reduced to writing and approved by the Court. A temporary hearing and resulting Order, or Agreed Order, are usually done when a fault based divorce is on file with the Court.

A Temporary Order deals with short-term financial and custody/visitation issues, pending a final hearing.  This is intended to be a “band-aid” on the situation and to maintain the status quo while  trial preparations are happening.

A “Legal Separation,” while not recognized in MS law, is typically a different animal than a Temp. Order. Parties can separate in Mississippi, though not “officially”.

The thought behind the a Separation is to allow a cooling off period or a trial-run at no longer living as husband and wife and seeing how that works.

The problem with attempting it in MS is that it requires a great deal of trust between the parties as there is no Order, or teeth, if one party reneges on their agreement with regards to finances or custody.  And typically there is not a great deal of trust between separating parties.  However, a separation is a viable option in the tool belt of bringing calm to highly emotional domestic situations and can even lead to reconciliation in some circumstances.

What needs to be considered for separating, be it agreed or Court ordered?

  • The Children.  What is the custody and visitation schedule?  A Court would use the Albright factors to make a determination.  If by agreement, the parties have a lot of leeway in what the arrangement is.
  • Financial Support.  How much child support? How much spousal support?  The Court requires each party to complete a financial statement and exchange it with the other party.  Support awards are based on adjusted gross income and reasonable needs of the parties.
  • The House.  Who stays in the home?  Typically it’s the spouse that has the children, but regardless of who gets the house on a temporary basis, it does not mean that is how it will be at a final hearing.
  • The Bills.  Who pays what?  The house, utilities, school, cars, credit cards, etc… This is always a bone of contention.
  • Conduct During Separation.  In Mississippi you are married until you are divorced.  Even if you and your spouse have an “agreement” your spouse could still get grounds for divorce against you during a separation.
  • How Long is the Separation?  When do you decide to try something else?  This will be based on your specific facts and circumstances.

Matthew Thompson is a Litigation Attorney in Mississippi and can help you separate on temporary and permanent basis.

Follow the blog:#BowTieLawyer 

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Child Custody, Child Support, Modifications

Changing your Court Papers; Custody vs. Visitation

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Modification is the process that is used to change a Court Order.  We previously discussed how NOT to modify your papers here.

Below are the basics for the right way to modify your current Court Order.  Child Custody, Visitation and Child Support are always modifiable. However, each has a separate standard.  Each require that you prove something different…

1.  Child Custody is the most difficult to modify. The non-custodial parent, must demonstrate 1) a material change in circumstances,  2) adverse to the child, 3) in the home of the custodial parent.  In English, dad has to show that there has been a big change, harmful to the child and it was mom’s fault.  It does not matter how much better dad is doing.  It does not matter that he has a new job, making good money, and has remarried Mary Poppins.  The Standard concerns what is going on in mom’s house.

A material change could be bad grades, serious behavior problems, serious problems with mom or serious problem with mom’s new beau. Now, once you show the bad change, harmful to the child, and it’s mom’s fault, dad wins, right? No. That provides the Court the authority to go back through the Albright factors for the Court to determine which parent is in the best interest of the child.

2.  Child Support is modifiable upon a showing of  1) a material change in circumstances, unanticipated at the time of the Order and that either the 2) paying parent’s income has increased (or a non-voluntary decrease) in a meaningful capacity or that the 3) child’s reasonable needs and expenses have increased, or both an increase in income and needs.  It should be noted that Child Support is statutory, as noted here, and the paying parent’s responsibility to pay does not continue to increase, just because his/her income does.

3.   Visitation has the lowest standard to modify.  In order to modify visitation all one needs to do is demonstrate that the current schedule is not working.  This can be shown by showing that a party moved over several hours away making every other weekend unworkable or by showing that due to the child’s schedule, or a parent’s work schedule the visitation plan is not working.  This one is easier to pursue, but the outcome is not always predictable, so have a plan for what schedule will work if you are seeking to change it because of distance or a work schedule issue.

*Certain other aspects of Order’s can/may be modifiable as well; ie; alimony, other child benefits.

Matthew Thompson is a Mississippi Child Custody Attorney and reminds you to follow your papers.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer  You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

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Child Custody, Child Support, Modifications

Modifying Your Divorce Without the Court, Think Again.

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This is an all too common occurrence.  Mom and Dad get divorced, rock along and a few years down the road they decide to change their deal.  They are getting along, at least better than before the divorce, and both are burned from their past experiences with attorneys and attorney fees.  So…they decide we can handle this like mature adults.  Dad wants a custody tweak, Mom needs a support adjustment – bam-shabang– let’s just do it.

Mom and Dad agree that the Order will be “modified.”  They switch to a week-on, week-off custody arrangement.  The kids are older, it works.  Dad starts paying support directly for the benefit of the kids. He pays for the child’s car and insurance, and picks up health insurance which was previously mom’s responsibility. Dad does not pay mom directly. It’s about the same money, probably.  What could go wrong?  A lot of things!

Court Orders may only be modified by other Court Orders.  Once an Order is issued and in place the parties are bound to follow it.  This is so ironclad  that the Court has a mechanism in place to enforce its Orders that can result in the breaching party having to pay fines and/or go to jail. This process is called Contempt.  If you are not following the Order in your case, you are subject to a contempt petition being filed by the other party.

But if we agreed what’s the big deal?  The deal is that Agreement is not worth the paper its written on if it is not approved by the Judge.  At some point in the future, and it never fails, Mom and Dad have a falling out, again.  Mom goes to attorney and tells him that Dad has not paid child support in two years.  Mom sues  Dad for Contempt for all of the “back” support and then “un-agrees” to the custody change and goes back to an every other weekend schedule for visitation.   Dad counter sues for a custody modification seeking custody now due to mom’s change and contempt over the health insurance issue.  The only sure thing now is that each has considerable contempt for the other and the Court is left to sort it out.**

Dad scrambles to get his “proof” that he paid the car and insurance, but that is not what was ordered.  Mom tries to justify her position on the visitation retread because that is what the papers said, as if her hands are tied now and the “papers” know best.  Had they done an Agreed Order and had it approved by the Court, they could have accomplished the same thing and not left the door open for future problems of having the old Order used against them.  Both would have been protected and still had the same “teeth” in enforcing their Agreement it would have just been enforcement of their new Agreement.  Now both have risk and have conducted, at least, actionable non-compliance with the Court order.

If you modify your Order/Agreement do it in writing, signed and approved by the Court. It’s the only way to guaranty that the Agreement is enforceable and for protection from being subject to Contempt for not doing what was in the prior Order.

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