Category Archives: Divorce

Advice to Parents; Grow up

If you are the parent to a child then act like it.

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We have seen the reports and stories of parents going off the deep end. Using illegal drugs, abusing substances, pursuing bad-idea relationships and ultimately putting their own selfish desires above the needs of their children.  It’s time to stop.

There are only a handful of people that you, as a parent, are ultimately responsible for; yourself and the people you brought into this world, your children.

Don’t shirk your duties. Don’t neglect your children. Don’t be so consumed with your own desires that you lose sight of what is important. Don’t hate another person so much it clouds your judgment when it comes to your children.

Matthew Thompson is a Child Custody attorney and encourages parents to grow up and act like a parent.

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Clarion-Ledger: Protecting families, or prolonging misery?

Protecting families, or prolonging misery?

Matthew Thompson is a Mississippi family law attorney and professor, and having difficult, drawn-out and costly divorces would be good for his pocketbook.

But Thompson supports reform and changes to divorce laws, “even though it’s against my own self interests.”

“The current laws make it expensive, and in some instances, impossible to get a divorce,” said Thompson, whose firm focuses on family law statewide and who is a professor teaching domestic relations at Mississippi College’s law school.

Thompson said the Legislature’s recent divorce law reform, removing a corroboration requirement for abused spouses, is a needed change.

“Our law has required cruelty claims be corroborated with evidence beyond that of the victim’s testimony,” Thompson said. “… Even if the court believed you, you had to have a neighbor, family member, police report or picture, or you didn’t have corroboration … Now, if the court finds the victim truthful and credible, the court can accept that. If you take a step back and think, that makes sense. Our judges have always been the lie detector, always the barometer of whether someone was credible.

“There is some form of abuse in a vast number of divorce cases,” Thompson said. “Not every one, but a lot of them. When you drill down and include physical, mental, emotional, verbal abuse — It’s a significant number of cases. We as human beings treat the people we are supposed to love the most the worst.”

Thompson said he supports Mississippi creating a “no-fault” ground for divorce. South Dakota is the only other state without such a ground. He said opposition to this change, from those saying it will weaken the sanctity of marriage and increase divorces, is misguided. In practice, Mississippi’s lack of a no-fault ground allows one spouse to hold up a divorce, sometimes for years.

“The idea behind making it difficult to get a divorce is that Mississippi is promoting marriage,” Thompson said. “But when you go 10 years and it costs tens of thousands of dollars — those aren’t intact families trying to get back together.

“Our law promotes divorce blackmail,” Thompson said. “… You have to pay what I say, or agree to what I want, or I won’t agree to a divorce … You have a fundamental, constitutional right to marriage, according to (a U.S. Supreme Court ruling). Shouldn’t you have a fundamental right to a divorce? I guess the counter to that is that you don’t have to get married.”

Thompson said some of the moral and religious arguments focused on divorce policies should be focused on the front-end, marriage policies.

“Our state has made it phenomenally easy to get into a marriage,” Thompson said. “There used to be a three-day wait, used to be a blood test requirement. But now you just go to the circuit clerk and pay $25.

“Studies show having mom and dad happily married and living together is what’s best for children and families,” Thompson said. “Having mom and dad get along and living separately would be second best. Mom and dad living together and fighting and being miserable, whether it’s violent or just cold war, that’s not the best. If this is really about protecting families, there are ways to do that, but still have an appropriate and reasonable means to get out of a marriage. It shouldn’t take a beating or physical violence to get there.”

Contact Geoff Pender at 601-961-7266 or gpender@gannett.com. Follow him on Twitter.

Annulment 101

§ 93-7-3. Causes for annulment of marriages.

Annulment is having your marriage legally revoked.

A marriage may be annulled for any one (1) of the following causes existing at the time of the marriage ceremony:

(a) Incurable impotency.

(b) Adjudicated mental illness or incompetence of either or both parties. Action of a spouse who has been adjudicated mentally ill or incompetent may be brought by guardian, or in the absence of a guardian, by next friend, provided that the suit is brought within six (6) months after marriage.

(c) Failure to comply with the provisions of Sections 93-1-5 through 93-1-9 when any marriage affected by that failure has not been followed by cohabitation.

Or, in the absence of ratification:

(d) When either of the parties to a marriage is incapable, from want of age or understanding, of consenting to any marriage, or is incapable from physical causes of entering into the marriage state, or where the consent of either party has been obtained by force or fraud, the marriage shall be void from the time its nullity is declared by a court of competent jurisdiction.

(e) Pregnancy of the wife by another person, if the husband did not know of the pregnancy.
 
Suits for annulment under paragraphs (d) and (e) shall be brought within six (6) months after the ground for annulment is or should be discovered, and not thereafter.
 
The causes for annulment of marriage set forth in this section are intended to be new remedies and shall in no way affect the causes for divorce declared elsewhere to be the law of the State of Mississippi as they presently exist or as they may from time to time be amended. § 93-7-3.

Matthew Thompson is a Divorce and Annulment lawyer in Mississippi.

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Mississippi Uniform Child Abduction Prevention Act (UCAPA); How to prevent Parental Abduction in Custody cases.

In 2010, Mississippi enacted the Uniform Child Abduction Prevention Act (UCAPA). This statute is designed to give the Courts the authority to prevent child abduction in parental custody/visitation disputes. This statute, in conjunction with the UCCJEA regarding interstate jurisdictional determinations, provides remedies to  prevent abduction by providing for injunctive relief upon a demonstration of a credible “risk of abduction.” 

The statutes provides the following;

§ 93-29-13. Factors to determine risk of abduction.

(a)  In determining whether there is a credible risk of abduction of a child, the court shall consider any evidence that the petitioner or respondent:

(1) Has previously abducted or attempted to abduct the child;

(2) Has threatened to abduct the child;

(3) Has recently engaged in activities that may indicate a planned abduction, including:

(A) Abandoning employment;

(B) Selling a primary residence;

(C) Terminating a lease;

(D) Closing bank or other financial management accounts, liquidating assets, hiding or destroying financial documents or conducting any unusual financial activities;

(E) Applying for a passport or visa or obtaining travel documents for the respondent, a family member or the child; or

(F) Seeking to obtain the child’s birth certificate or school or medial records;

(4) Has engaged in domestic violence, stalking or child abuse or neglect;

(5) Has refused to follow a child-custody determination;

(6) Lacks strong familial, financial, emotional or cultural ties to the state or the United States;

(7) Has strong familial, financial emotional or cultural ties to another state or country;

(8) Is likely to take the child to a country that:

(A) Is not a party to the Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction and does not provide for the extradition of an abducting parent or for the return of an abducted child;

(B) Is party to the Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction but:

(i) The Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction is not in force between the United States and that country;

(ii) Is noncompliant according to the most recent compliance report issued by the United States Department of State; or

(iii) Lacks legal mechanisms for immediately and effectively enforcing a return order under the Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction;

(C) Poses a risk that the child’s physical or emotional health or safety would be endangered in the country because of specific circumstances relating to the child or because of human rights violations committed against children;

(D) Has laws or practices that would:

(i) Enable the respondent, without due cause, to prevent the petitioner from contacting the child;

(ii) Restrict the petitioner from freely traveling to or exiting from the country because of the petitioner’s gender, nationality, marital status or religion; or

(iii) Restrict the child’s ability legally to leave the country after the child reaches the age of majority because of a child’s gender, nationality or religion;

(E) Is included by the United States Department of State on a current list of state sponsors of terrorism;

(F) Does not have an official United States diplomatic presence in the country; or

(G) Is engaged in active military action or war, including a civil war, to which the child may be exposed;

(9) Is undergoing a change in immigration or citizenship status that would adversely affect the respondent’s ability to remain in the United States legally;

(10) Has had an application for United States citizenship denied;

(11) Has forged or presented misleading or false evidence on government forms or supporting documents to obtain or attempt to obtain a passport, a visa, travel documents, a social security card, a driver’s license or other government-issued identification card or has made a misrepresentation to the United States government;

(12) Has used multiple names to attempt to mislead or defraud; or

(13) Has engaged in any other conduct the court considers relevant to the risk of abduction.

(b)  In the hearing on a petition under this chapter, the court shall consider any evidence that the respondent believed in good faith that the respondent’s conduct was necessary to avoid imminent harm to the child or respondent and any other evidence that may be relevant to whether the respondent may be permitted to remove or retain the child.

Miss. Code Ann. §93-29-1 et. seq.

UCAPA is a another arrow in the quiver of child custody remedies when dealing with a dangerous opposing party. It is not often invoked, but is a necessary remedy in the above specific situations.

Matthew Thompson is a Child Custody lawyer in Mississippi and advises all parents to take serious Child Custody matters.

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Legal Forgiveness = Forgiveness? in a Divorce Action

One of the most claimed grounds for divorce is Adultery. Actually, the statue refers to it as “Uncondoned Adultery.” What, you ask, is Uncondoned Adultery? That is adultery that has not been “forgiven.”

Condonation is “legal forgiveness.”  This happens when the aggrieved spouse knows of the fault and decides to reconcile with the other party. You resumed living together as husband and wife, had sex and otherwise tried to make it work.

Once this occurs you no longer have grounds for divorce based on Adultery. Even if it didn’t work!

There are a few strings attached, however. The guilty spouse must, in “good faith” attempt the reconciliation. Additionally, the aggrieved spouse can only forgive what they know about. If there were multiple affairs and all were not disclosed there may still exist fault grounds, whether they are aware of it or not. Also, if the adultery is repeated it revives the grounds for divorce.

Condonation is a difficult issues to wrestle with in divorce.  The Court must consider the knowledge of the aggrieved spouse, the intent of the guilty spouse, the effort(s) to reconcile – whether they are in good faith. All these are fact specific and subjective determinations to be made by the Court.

Matthew Thompson is a divorce attorney in Mississippi and cautions you that some lawyers will advise the guilty party to do or say whatever is necessary to get the other party back in bed, for “reconciliation,” so that the defense of Condonation may be used.  

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R. Kelly; Singing the Blues?

Robert Sylvester Kelly, better known as R. Kelly, has been sued in Hinds County, Jackson, Mississippi.

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Kelly, a singer, songwriter, record producer, and former professional basketball player, is the named Defendant, along with his professional entities, in a pending Alienation of Affection lawsuit. The suit was filed by a Hinds County Sheriff’s Deputy, Kenny Bryant.

Bryant alleges that R. Kelly interfered with Bryant’s marriage relationship ultimately alienating his wife’s affection from Bryant.

Alienation of Affection is a Mississippi common law tort. That means it is a civil wrong, based on case-law and not a statute.

Alienation of Affection claims allow the wronged spouse to sue the “significant other” of the guilty spouse for the breakdown of the marriage.  There are only 6 states in the country that still recognize Alienation, but Mississippi is one of them and in the 1990’s our  appellate Courts reaffirmed Alienation as alive and well in the Mississippi legal system.

Alienation of Affection requires;

1) Wrongful Conduct, ie: adultery;

2) Loss of Affections, meaning there was a good relationship prior to the wrongful conduct; and

3) Causal Connection linking the Wrongful Conduct to the actual Loss of Affection.  All 3 must be present for a viable claim.  There is a 3 year statute of limitations in which to bring the claim, beginning when the loss of affection is finally accomplished.

Even if the above can be shown it does not mean that the Plaintiff wins. A jury would then decide a money value on the “damages.”  That is a hard figure to quantify.

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Friday’s Humor. 

It’s NOT a Vast Conspiracy…(usually).

“Do you think the Judge was on the take?”

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There have certainly been instances of judicial corruption. However, they are few and far between. In Family Law matters, Judges wield considerable power, read as discretion. The Judge, a.k.a. Chancellor, decides what evidence is admitted, how to determine witness credibility and what weight is given both.

To help in this endeavor, there are rules which the Court must apply and adhere to. These rules deal with whether evidence may be introduced, or if certain “witnesses” may even offer testimony. The lawyer knowing these rules, or at least that they exist and where to find them, should argue the application of the rules to the offered evidence or testimony and then the Judge determines if it is accepted.

With that background, if Court did not go your way ask your lawyer first. Were they prepared? Did they make sensible arguments? Did they know the law on the issues before the Court? Because, if they were not prepared, made nonsensical arguments and did not know the proper legal standard, perhaps your loss was not due to the vast conspiracy, but do to your own efforts and that of your counsel.

99 times out of 100 your loss is not to be put at the blame of the Judge.  The Judge wasn’t bribed. Think about it. Why would the Judge risk his or her career, reputation and freedom just to give you a bad deal? They would not. Think about the checks and balances in place, the process for having rulings appealed, the fact that every word uttered in Court is taken down, recorded and documented and then look in the mirror and ask that person if they have done the right thing.

The Judge wasn’t bribed. Just maybe, the outcome was because of the facts.

Matthew Thompson is a Family Law Attorney in Mississippi and represents parents in domestic disputes regarding divorce, alimony, child custody and support.

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