Category Archives: humor

Erection Bill Rises…Again…

You read about the proposed Mississippi legislation dubbed the Contraception Begins at Erection Act.”

This proposal sought to make it a crime in Mississippi “for a person to discharge genetic materials without the intent to fertilize an embryo”

The penalties were monetary fines…

Blackmon stated that his Bill was intended to bring attention towards, “…the vast majority of bills relating to contraception and/or abortion focus on the woman’s role when men are fifty percent of the equation. This bill highlights that fact and brings the man’s role into the conversation. People can get up in arms and call it absurd but I can’t say that bothers me.”

While this Bill went limp in committee in Mississippi it saw a second round of life as it was recently brought up in Ohio!

Anita Somani, Ohio State Representative, an OB/GYN, admits she knows how ludicrous her bill sounds. The “Conception Begins at Erection” Act seeks to make it a crime for a man to ejaculate without the intention of reproducing.

Somani reports “It’s gotten more attention than any other bill I’ve introduced since becoming a state representative.‘ Her rationale is to finally address “the inequity in reproductive bills, most of which have targeted women and their health care providers.”

The scuttlebutt on the street is that Somani’s Bill, akin to its Mississippi cousin, will be a failure to launch.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and supports procreation!

An Open Invitation to Colab…

Believe it or not, there are not many Mississippi Legislators that are lawyers!

Saturday Night Live compared the Mississippi Legislature to a hissing possum. It was funny…

“Whew!” you say? Not so fast. Our legislators make the laws. This may be the one instance more lawyers could help!!

There is proposed legislation with terminology, words, that do not mean what you (and our legislators) think they mean. Words matter. Legal words matter.

There’s a marked difference between May and Shall in the eyes of the law.

So, legislators, Please contact me at any time about any questions regarding proposed legislation. If i have an opinion I will share it. If I am unqualified to comment I will admit it, and if you ask that our discussion remain confidential I will honor that.

Let’s get this right the first time. Its too important to not to.

Matthew Thompson is a 20-year practicing lawyer, law school professor, author of the family law text book in Mississippi and not afraid to speak out and speak up. Contact him via email or phone. Matthew@ThompsonLaw.ms or (601)850-8000

Hiking Boots Oops…

A few years ago my friend, Will Smith, moved to Nashville, TN. Prior to the move he dropped his favorite pair of nice hiking boots off at the shoe repair place. The shop was to resole the boots.

Will called and went by to check on them prior to moving but the shop was always closed, but still appeared to be “in business.”

After he moved, I had the bright idea for the perfect phone scam…a little Boot Goofing!

Attached is an audio file of the radio segment that aired on Y101!

We had Will going in the first half… It also interrupted his day at work!

Valentine’s Special…

Happy Valentine’s Day from your favorite Divorce Attorney!!

Happy Easter!

Tip of the Day:

Don’t be a Drama Llama.

Legal Citation of the Decade: Madison the City, an Old Scandal and FOUL language…

A recent decision ended the litigation between the Estate of Mark Mayfield vs. The City of Madison. It was a sordid affair involving the Cochran nursing home scandal, a hotly contested U.S. Senate race, a tragic death and multiple twists that prove time and again that truth is stranger than fiction.

You can read the full Order here and see a myriad of comments from legal scholars that post to the Blog; Jackson Jambalaya

Today’s post just focuses on one quote from Federal Judge, Carlton Reeves’s Opinion.

At the third and final step, the Mayfields must come forward with evidence that a jury could use to conclude that the City’s probable cause was, for lack of a better term, bullshit. See generally HARRYG. FRANKFURT, ON BULLSHIT (2005) (attempting to define the term). The questions at step three are supposed to be tailored to the particular circumstances of the case…”

“…In this case, the framework suggests that we should ask a series of questions. Did the investigation follow the evidence to its targets, or did the police “round up the usual suspects? ”Was there anything unusual about the timing or the manner of the City’s investigation? Is there any other case where the City Attorney met with the District Attorney and the investigators everyday to discuss charges and be involved in how those charges would proceed? Were persons who engaged in similar conduct also arrested, or were they let off the hook because of more agreeable political beliefs? See Nieves, 139 S. Ct. at 1727.An examination of the evidence adduced in this case satisfactorily answers these questions. Instead of rounding up the most vocal McDaniel supporters, City investigators followed the evidence from Kelly to Mary to Mayfield. The police were given free rein to conduct their investigation as they saw fit, without direction from the Mayor, a Cochran supporter. There is no evidence that before the Rose Cochran incident, the City of Madison was itching for an excuse to go after McDaniel supporters. And there is no evidence of differential treatment of McDaniel and Cochran supporters. As an example, there is no evidence that Cochran supporters entered a McDaniel relative’s home in Madison, after which the City refused to prosecute them.”

It’s not often you see Bullsh*t attempt to be defined in a judicial opinion.

Matthew Thompson is a civil litigation/family law attorney and “LOL-ed” when reading this Opinion.

Quote of the Day: Covid-19 & Homeschooling.

I’d rather have him watch classic Godzilla movies and play in the yard and pretend to be a Jedi rather than figure out basic math.

A Boston, MA parent is tired of homeschooling his kindergartener.

Amid the barrage of learning apps, video meet-ups and e-mailed assignments that pass as pandemic home school, some frustrated and exhausted parents are choosing to disconnect entirely for the rest of the academic year.“Id.

Respect and admiration for teachers are growing as the pandemic-forced school closures continue.

As a parent, your job is to do what is best for your child, even during a pandemic.

Matthew Thompson is a child custody lawyer and enjoys his share of Godzilla and Jedi movies, but reminds parents that rearing your child continues to be a top priority.