Tag Archives: win

When Winning at all Costs is No Win!

Did you Win?

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I am regularly asked how many cases have I won? Potential clients, non-lawyers, friends and relatives use this terminology. But, winning a case isn’t really about winning. It’s about mitigating damages and liability. It’s about preserving finances and relationships, if possible. A win is really knowing the best and worst case scenario and achieving what you aimed for or better.

When is a win not a win? When you leave a wake of havoc, of hate and a trail of tears.

Unfortunately, some lawyers take this tactic in Family Law. They believe scorched earth is the best and only approach. What they do not tell their clients, though, is that it is really only what is best for themselves, the lawyer. It is best for the lawyer financially, or perhaps they even have a personal animus against the other party or the the other lawyer.

Lawyers, in my experience, do not like to give the tough advice. That the fight is not worth it emotionally or financially. That if you win the other side ends up hating you and will spend the rest of their days waiting for you to mess up so they can pounce upon you.

The win at all costs approach results in frivolous filings, extreme delay, and angry judges. The overwhelming “win” results in an appeal, bar complaints and ultimately you may well lose in the end.

A Win is really not being unpleasantly surprised in the end result. A win equates with maintaining your relationships with your children and immediate family and having the means to provide a satisfactory life.

Matthew Thompson is a Divorce attorney and advises his clients when a win is a win and when it is not.

Follow the blog: #BowTieLawyer Visit the website: #Thompson Law FirmYou may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Going to Court is HARD.

I have blogged recently about Why Settling Your Case is Best, avoiding Court, and Why Going to Court is “Best.”  The gist of the former being settlement is preferred for having a say in the final outcome and having predictability and the latter, going to Court is best when there is no room for compromise.

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Unfortunately, I have been involved in the latter, a case where there was no room for compromise.  From my perspective one party was primarily the aggressor and was encouraged by the attorney to take unreasonable positions and force the matter to Court.  Of course, they did not view their own positions as meritless.  Also, I’m sure they thought my client and I were wretches…

Regardless, hard feelings abounded.  This case had some history.  What should have been a run of the mill divorce and custody matter was extremely contentious and was litigated over an issue that was not an issue.  In Round One, after most of a day of trial, the Court stopped the matter and told the other side they were going to lose on their issue and the case did settle.

But, like the A-Team, they had a plan!  Just a few months after it was final they decided another bite at the apple was proper. Based primarily on speculation…which was eventually admitted at Court, the other side sought to change the deal they had agreed to just months prior.  Round Two in Court was based on rank speculation.  After hours of testimony, haughty lecturing, and what can only be described as highly stylized testimony by the aggressive party and deeply emotional testimony by the other, the Court dismissed the case.

So, what is the take away?  Sour grapes?  I don’t think so, at least not  on my part.  It made me realize, yet again, Court is HARD.  It is not fun.  It is emotional.  And, even when you win, nobody wins.  Here’s what else can be guaranteed, when you successfully defend against baseless claims from the other side who thinks they are completely in the right when they are not, you better get ready for posturing and Round 3!

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney and knows that sometimes even when you win you don’t win.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the websiteThompson Law FirmYou may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms