All posts by BowTieLawyer

Matthew operates the Thompson Law Firm, pllc, a Mississippi based Family Law firm emphasizing; Divorce, Child Custody, Child Support, Modification, Contempt and Appeals, handling family law cases throughout Mississippi. (601) 850-8000 Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms www.BowTieLawyer.ms

How to tie a Bow Tie. BowTieLawyer (video)

The proper way to tie a Bow Tie.

  1. Tie a basic overhand knot (right over left) and pull the knot to the center of your shirt neck.

  2. Fold the right side of the bow so that the “left bow” is doubled and the “right bow” is a single layer.  The fold on the “left bow” becomes the far edge of the bow tie.

  3. Place the center of the bow on the knot in the center of the shirt neck.

  4. Pull the left side of the bow over the middle of the bow and knot. Hanging straight down.

  5. Snap the bow closed and hold the bow in place.

  6. Lightly pull the closed bow to reveal a small hole behind the bow, but in front of the knot.

  7. Fold the left side, which is now the “back bow” while pushing the “back right bow” through the small hole.

  8. Once through, pull the front left bow and back right bow to straighten and tighten the bow tie.

  9. It does not have to look perfect, and a little imperfection can be “on purpose” because you tied it yourself.

Thompson Law Firm, pllc       (601) 850-8000

From No Fault to Yo’ Fault

The clever title to this blog was proposed by an attorney friend of mine that handles some family law matters, but practices extensively in other areas of law.

We were recently discussing how “No Fault” cases get derailed.  While Mississippi is technically not a true “No Fault” state, there are provisions for an Irreconcilable Differences divorce.  (commonly referred to as “No Fault,” blogged prior.)

We were discussing what gets them off track.  The parties, after getting over the initial shock of divorce, decide they will be adults and agree.  They think they can agree to the divorce and resolve their differences.   After all, they did manage to get along for 9 years, have two kids and bought a house.  What could go wrong?   Perhaps they searched online and looked at divorceyourself.com.  A very risky idea!

Well, the old adage that the devil is in the details is never truer than in divorce.  The No Fault idea gets derailed when the fellow realizes he will have to pay 20% of his income towards child support, plus health insurance and alimony. Yikes!  He realizes it’s cheaper to keep her.  (sorry for the cliché)  The wife gets squirrely when she realizes that her half of the retirement account is consumed by balancing the equity in the house, or that the money she gets cannot be realized without significant tax consequences.

Parties to a divorce don’t realize child support is until 21, not 18 in Mississippi.  They don’t know the types of custody, or what that means.  They agree to things that they cannot legally agree  to and fail to consider the consequences.  They agree to “legal terms” that do not exist in Mississippi law, because they saw it online.  And lastly, one of them is finally convinced to see an attorney by a close friend or family member and when they do and realize the consequences of what they were about to do and back out, the other side becomes angry and backs out too.  All of a sudden an easy deal becomes complicated, expensive and adversarial.

Want to keep your situation from going from No Fault to Yo’ Fault?  Do your homework, have an assessment with an attorney that practices family law, keep the peace, and be smart.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney that can handle your divorce whether it’s your fault, their fault, or somebody else’s.  Trust the Bow Tie.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer

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If the CIA Can’t get Away With an Affair What Makes you Think you Can?!

Unless you live in a cave, or in the path of Hurricane Sandy, you have heard about the CIA director’s recent revelation that he was having an affair.  It resulted in his immediate resignation which was accepted by the White House.  While the full details will likely never be known, the fact remains that the head of the CIA, arguably a person who could keep a secret, had a big secret of his own exposed. (I realize conspiracy theories abound as to why, but that’s not the point.)

I am often asked what are some signs of an Affair. Below are some common red flags to look for;
  • Guarded of the Cell Phone.  The phone is password protected and/or never off of their person.
  • A Second Cell Phone.  They have a 2nd phone without a need or the other phone is secret.
  • Change in Attire.  The spouse is dressing in trendier clothes or “younger” or more “revealing” clothes.
  • New Undies.  Provocative undergarments appear that you don’t see in use.
  • Working out.  A sudden change in their workout regimen, without a scare from the Dr. and it’s not New Year’s Day.
  • Body Grooming.  Manscaping, or new cologne, perfumes, etc.
  • Tanning.  A sudden desire to tan.
  • Teeth Whitening.  All of a sudden caring about hygiene when they previously did not so much.
  • Body Augmentation.  Having lifts or lipos.
  • New Career.  A career shift that is out of the ordinary.
  • Longer Work Hours.  Having to work late, a lot more often, and out-of-town travel when they previously did not.
  • Unexplained Absences.  Going to the store for some milk and being gone 6 hours.
  • Bad On-Line Habits.  Surfing at all hours of the night, deleting the browser history.
  • FaceBooking Old Flames.
  • Financial Shenanigans.  Raiding joint accounts or creating new accounts and directing their monies to those.

If you see a number of these warning signs, keep your eyes and ears open, your wits about you and go see an attorney.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and believes if the CIA can’t cover up an affair, you probably can’t either.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@wmtlawfirm.com.

Deposition Imposition; What is a Deposition?

Depositions are routinely taken in lawsuits, and are common in family law cases.  A deposition is a part of the “discovery” process where the parties or a witness are asked questions, under oath, outside of Court, so that the attorney will know what they will say when in Court.  You have heard the old maxim that an attorney should never ask a question that he doesn’t know the answer to, well the deposition is the mechanism where you can ask that question.  A wide variety of questions may be asked in the depositions even those that likely would not be relevant in Court.

Depositions are usually at the attorney’s office. The attorneys, the parties and a Court reporter are typically the only persons in attendance.  Depositions are transcribed and may be videotaped.

Questions about the witnesses education, work, finances and efforts with regards to the children are all fair game.  The dirty details of fault are also fair game. Naming names and being specific are part of the process too.  Depositions are a tool to gain information as well as pin witnesses or parties down on what their “story” is so that it does not “change” later.

I had an instance where I took the father’s deposition in a custody modification case. Both parties had remarried.  Step-parents always have a bull’s eye on their backs in custody modification cases. I made sure and asked the father several times and different ways if he had any issues with step-dad.  The answer was “No.”  Well, it took several months to get to trial. At trial the father tried to change his tune.  He attempted to say he had serious issues with step-dad and had for as long as he had been in the picture. I asked the father if recalled his deposition. He stuttered. I showed him the specific page and questions asked. He said he must have forgotten about the serious issues at the time of the deposition. Right.  He backed off on his assertions and the deposition “saved” the day.

Objections are rare in family law depositions, or at least less common than in trial.  They are typically limited to the “form of the question,” being made to preserve the right to object in the future, but the deponent usually still answers the question.  Questions regarding crimes, however, can be objected to and those are usually not answered – with the deponent pleading the 5th.  The 5th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution gives all persons the right to not incriminate themselves.  How does this come into play in family law? Adultery is a crime in Mississippi (blogged previously).

The bottom line in depositions is, while they are nerve wracking for the deponent, ultimately you are just answering questions and your job is to tell the truth and rely on your attorney.

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Financially Ever-After; Assets and Lies

Financial issues abound in almost every divorce action.  The parties fight over the money, the debt, the house, the business and anything else of value.  The financial consequences of divorce can not be overstated.  It typically results in a change in lifestyle for both parties, and despite the law that contemplates “maintaining the lifestyle of which you have grown accustomed,” divorce frequently results in both parties living a reduced lifestyle. It takes more money to run two households than it does one.

Mississippi Courts use a form for financial disclosures. This form is called an “Eight-oh-Five,” as it is Rule 8.05 (clickable) which requires the completion and use of a financial statement in family law cases.  The 8.05 must list all income, assets, expenses and liabilities.  Whether they be “joint” or solely owned by one party, they have to be disclosed.  The 8.05 also must include a recent pay stub, work history and the most recent tax return.  These are to be completed under oath and are subject to perjury safeguards.

Persons who have submitted materially false 8.05s have been held accountable by the Court, even well after the fact.  In a recent, notable case the husband, who also had a girlfriend, won the lottery about 2 months before the divorce. He did not disclose the winnings and it was an out of state lottery so the wife did not hear about it.  The parties were divorced.  About 4 years later, the now ex-husband’s girlfriend called the ex-wife to let her know that the husband had won the lottery just prior to the divorce. Why?  Well, the girlfriend found out that the fellow was now cheating on her.  The ex-wife filed a petition to re-open the matter due to fraud.  The husband’s failure to disclose was found to be “fraud on the Court” and the case was re-opened. The wife was awarded a portion of the winnings and attorney fees.

Moral of the story; disclose your assets and be honest. The Court requires full disclosure.

Thompson Law Firm, PLLC      (601) 850-8000

Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

 

Voting & Mississippi -(a very brief history)

With the election one day away, this is the (obligatory) “be sure you vote” blawg.

Tuesday we go to the polls to elect State and National officials.  You get to vote for the person you think should be President, and a MS Senator, (if in your district) Congressmen, 2 MS Supreme Court Justices , and a host of local positions, such as election commissioners.

We hear and see a lot of talk about Mississippi being subject to Federal oversight in her elections.  Below is a brief explanation of that Federal oversight.

Mississippi has a stormy past when it comes to voting rights – attempting to restrict minority access to voting –  and those past State actions can still be felt in today’s elections.  Mississippi is one of 8 states subject to the Department of Justice “pre-clearance” and oversight on any voting/election law changes pursuant to the Voting Rights Act of 1965. (Some sections of other states are subject to the pre-clearance oversight).

This legislation was designed to ensure the right of minority citizens to register and vote, and to prevent discriminatory laws passed by state and local entities. Both permanent and non-permanent provisions are proscribed. One permanent provision applies nationwide and outlaws any voting practice that results in the denial of voting rights on the basis of a person’s race, color, or membership in a language-minority group.

The non-permanent provisions that are relevant to Mississippi require “pre-clearance” of any changes in voting/election laws and  allows the DOJ to send federal observers to the polls in Mississippi

To pass muster any changes in voting/election laws must demonstrate that the voting change does not have the purpose or effect of discriminating on the basis of race or language minority. If the DOJ or the federal court determines that there is a discriminatory purpose or effect, then an objection is issued. If an objection is issued, the change cannot be put into operation.

Source: The Voting Rights Act and Mississippi 1965-2006, A Report of the RenewtheVRA.org, by Robert McDuff.

With that brief history of MS voting you can see the impact and importance that the right to vote has for many citizens.  Exercise your right to vote; let your voice be heard and your vote be counted.

Thompson Law Firm, PLLC            (601) 850-8000         Matthew@wmtlawfirm.com

Call an Audible! Effectively Making Adjustments in Strategy.

Watching the first half of the State game has inspired a blog! MSU is running a 3-4 defensive scheme. This means there are 3 defensive linemen and 4 linebackers. The problem here is that A&M is blocking 3 defenders with 5 and sometimes 6 blockers. The State defensive front is outnumbered.

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This allows the A&M QB, Johnny Football, time to find the open receiver or scramble around and run. Two things he’s good at.
The point is you have to have a game plan coming in, but when it’s not working and you find yourself trailing by 4 scores it’s time for a strategy change.
Divorce is the same way. You have to have a strategy to get to your end game. Be it through litigation or negotiation, but if you find it not working, change strategies!

A recent case I was involved in had the wife doggedly pursuing a cruelty based divorce. But cruelty “proof” was light to say the least. No physical abuse, no real major altercations and no extreme behavior by the husband. The wife’s strategy however was to take it all the way and get her divorce, despite that she could not. The husband’s strategy was to defend and negotiate. The wife refused. The husband stayed the course, much like, I suspect A&M will stay the course the second half.

Well, after a 1/2 day in trial and the wife’s “best” witnesses of cruelty barely making a fizzle with the Court, she decided to negotiate. The end result was an agreement to all issues with both giving more in some areas and taking less in others.

Her forgoing her prior game plan in the face of a defense ready for it resulted in an agreed resolution. Let’s hope MSU makes halftime adjustments with their defense and changes their game plan for the better.
UPDATE… The Bulldogs made adjustments at the half they came out with a 4 and 5 down linemen defensive scheme. They have been able to hold a potent A&M offense to just one additional score so far and have scored themselves and are putting together some good looking drives.

Make adjustments in your game plan as needed.

Thompson Law Firm, PLLC
(601) 850-8000
Matthew@ wmtlawfirm.com

Happy Halloween! Don’t Overlook this “Holiday.”

Halloween gets no respect from divorce attorneys.  No,  Halloween is not the reincarnated Rodney Dangerfield.  It’s just that in the divorce world Halloween is not a “real” holiday.  It is not recognized either nationally or by the state.  You do not get to miss school or skip work.  The banks and post office are still open, unlike a “real” holiday.  However, Halloween is nonetheless important!

Happy Halloween!

I oftentimes put provisions for visitation on Halloween in my agreements.  It is usually met with an awkward response by the other attorney saying,”you know that’s not a real holiday, right?”  However, Halloween is a real holiday to your kids.  Dressing up, trick or treating, hay rides, wagon rides, pumpkin carving and eating candy – What is not to love about Halloween?!?

Admittedly, Halloween does have a relatively short shelf life.  From around the age of 3 or 4 to about 13 is as long as it lasts and thereafter becomes a night of mischief.  But for those ten years or so – if you solely rely on the weekend rotation to get “your” Halloween, you may only get two.  Halloween is always a moving target with regards to what day of the week it falls upon.  Halloween needs to be addressed if you have young children.

See other forgotten Holidays hear https://bowtielawyer.wordpress.com/2012/08/31/labor-day-and-visitation/.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

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