Category Archives: Child Custody

Child Custody, Crime, Divorce, General Legal, Opinion

When NOT to Call the Police…in your family law matter.

03/01/2016 BowTieLawyer 5 Comments

When to call the Police regarding a Family Law matter has been blogged here, When to Call the Police! This post is When NOT to call the police and is just as important as the former. So, when do you NOT call the police?

When he Just Won’t do What you Want. He does not have to do what you want. He has to do what he is Ordered to do. Just because he won’t do as you ask, if he is complying with an Order, does not mean you should call the police. If he is not breaching the peace the police are not going to do anything.
When There is no Court Order in Place and the Kids are Otherwise Safe. Just because they are not with you does not mean the other parent will be arrested. When there is no Court Order in place each of you have equal rights to the children.
When she Leaves Them With her Family and NOT you. This is not a crime, if no Order is in place, it’s not even contempt. Again, if the kids are safe…
When you are the Instigator to a Fight. You will get arrested. You calling the police does not lessen the chances of this. The police’s job is to figure out what happened.
When There is NOT a Legitimate Reason to Call 911. Crying wolf does NOT help your case. You will likely be exposed for doing so and it will backfire. Don’t do it. Also, when you cry wolf and allege abuse that did not happen it makes it more difficult for the next person who really did suffer abuse. If it’s not an Emergency don’t call.
He’s 15 Minutes Late for the Pick-up or Drop-off. It’s not kidnapping if he’s stuck in traffic. The police are not going to do anything. You probably shouldn’t even call your attorney. Just wait 15 more minutes or call him.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and if you find yourself in an Emergency call 911, and if you find yourself not getting what you want call your attorney or your mamma.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@BowTieLawyer.ms

Child Custody, Crime, Divorce, General Legal

The TRUTH about LIE Detectors.

02/25/2016 BowTieLawyer 2 Comments

“I’ll take a lie detector test!” Famous last words.

http://www.artofmanliness.com/2010/01/08/become-a-human-lie-detector-how-to-sniff-out-a-liar/

Lie Detector Tests and their application in Mississippi Law is limited. The tests themselves are deemed generally unreliable by a legal standard and are not admissible in Court, absent mutual agreement or stipulation otherwise. However, law enforcement relies on them when administered properly. Personally, I have seen testing and the results impact several cases.

First off, What is a Polygraph Test? A test which measures and records physiological indicators such as; blood pressure, pulse, respiration, and skin conductivity, while the subject is asked and answers a series of questions. Wikipedia.

During the actual test only the test taker and examiner are present. The questions asked are typically only a few and they are asked a number of times, the exact same way. There are no surprise questions, no questions that are not rehearsed, and no Lamp Shades.

The test is measuring your involuntary responses and during the pre-test phase you are instructed to lie about an answer for comparison to involuntary responses during the testing.

Despite their limited Courtroom application, law enforcement agencies routinely administer Polygraph tests to suspects of crimes and the FBI uses polygraph testing regularly for not only suspects and witnesses, but also testing their own personnel, staff and agents.

I have used Polygraph testing in several cases where issues involved abuse allegations. In one instance a properly administered and passed Polygraph test helped result in a matter being dismissed by the Court and helped end a criminal investigation and rightly so.

As for the tricks on Ocean’s Eleven on to how to beat the test…well, the FBI tests for counter measures.

Matthew Thompson is a Family Law litigation attorney in Mississippi and encourages you not to lie!

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

Child Custody, Child Support, Divorce, General Legal

You Got Served! Now What?

02/17/2016 BowTieLawyer Leave a comment

Is that person following me? Why am I being called up to the personnel office? You hope against hope that it is not a package from 1) the IRS, or 2) an attorney. The person may be a plain clothes process server you have never seen before or even a sheriff’s deputy or constable. What do you do? Run? Scream? Invoke the Castle Doctrine? No.

Breath. Take the papers. Be polite to that person, as they may later be a witness.

What to do When you get Legal Papers?

1) Take the papers.

2) Review the papers.

3) Make a copy.

4) Take them to an attorney.

“Okay. I took the papers. What next?” Call your lawyer. DO NOT IGNORE THE PAPERS! Do not put them in the car to be forgotten. Do not pile them up with your junk mail.

In most instances the moment you received those papers a potentially critical deadline began to run. That deadline can be from 2 days to 7 to 30 or 45 days, but nonetheless a clock is now ticking.

On numerous occasions I have had a potential client call and say that they have Court on Wednesday. I think, “well…today is Monday they can’t do that.” My next questions is when did you get the papers? “About 2 months ago” Yikes. Don’t do this.

Think of all the anxiety they have put themselves through with the weight of those legal papers on their mind. If you get papers take them to an attorney. Have them reviewed, know what they mean and how you need to respond to them.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney. “Leave the drama, take the papers.” (apologies to the Godfather).

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@BowTieLawyer.ms

Child Custody, Divorce, Marriage

Tip of the Day:”Hott Sexxy Gurl”

02/10/2016 BowTieLawyer 1 Comment

If your email or text signature ends with Emojis and
“Hott Sexxy Gurl,” it’s time for a change.

gallery-thumbnails — jennythip /free digitalphotos.net

In a Family Law situation you will be judged. You will be judged by the Judge, as that is his/her job. You will be judged by the other party’s attorney, the Guardian Ad Litem, and, frankly, every other person you come into contact with.

If every email ends in “😉 Hott Sexxy Gurl,” you will be judged. Rightly or wrongly, you will be judged.

Change your email and text signatures. It could just be your first name. Also, get a new email address if it’s “CuteBunnyLove@aol.com” or “JuneLovesJohnny@gmail.com.” One, you do not want to be reminded that June no longer loves Johnny and, two, it’s no longer cute.

Will it really make a difference? One would hope not, but why leave it to chance. It’s an easy quick change and it cannot hurt your case.

Sincerely,

Matthew

Matthew Thompson is a Child Custody Attorney in Mississippi and reminds you that you are being judged.

Follow the blog: #BowTieLawyer . You may also contact Matthew with your family law case or question at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Child Custody, Divorce, humor

When a Child testifies, You May Not get what you Intended.

02/08/2016 BowTieLawyer 1 Comment

“Well, let’s just ask little Johnny what he wants!”

“[P]arents in a divorce proceeding should if at all possible refrain from calling any of the children of their marriage…as witnesses, and counsel should advise their clients against doing so except in the most exigent cases.” Jethrow v. Jethrow, 571 So.2d 270, 274 (Miss. 1990).“

The Mississippi Supreme Court added that the reason and wisdom for this precaution needed no amplification as to why you should not compel your child to testify if it can be avoided.

The potential for emotional trauma is a given. But, another unstated reason a la Forrest Gump, “you never know what you are gonna get.“

In a particularly acrimonious custody case, the mother insisted on calling the 6 year old daughter to testify. She wanted her to say she wanted to live with mom. Mom had recently redecorated her room in pink and butterflies. However, when questioned she responded as follows;

Court: If you had a magic wand and you could wave it and live wherever you wanted, where would that be?

Child: A Castle!

Not mom’s, not dad’s, but a castle.

Matthew Thompson is a Child Custody Attorney in Mississippi and would also like to live in a castle.

Follow the blog: #BowTieLawyer . You may also contact Matthew with your family law case or question at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

alienation, Child Custody, Divorce, Visitation

Influencing Your Child (negatively) does NOT make you a good parent.

02/04/2016 BowTieLawyer 1 Comment

Little Johnny will say just about anything…

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Tears at the custody/visitation exchange are normal. Usually, 5 minutes after the exchange all is back to normal. The tears do not mean that they genuinely fear the other parent, or worse, or that they only want to be with just one parent. They are a child.

As a parent of that child your primary responsibility should be to comfort the child! You should not make the situation worse by being pouty, confrontational or making statements that inflame the situation. You should not toy with the child’s emotion on whether they can stay just a little while longer.

Instead you should fake happiness for the child that they get to spend time with the other parent. For example, “Look Little Johnny, mommy is here. You and mommy are going to have so much fun and I’ll see you again real soon!” Do this while helping the child get in the car and make sure he or she has their stuff. That’s it.

That’s how exchanges should go. If you, as a parent, are not helping, then you are the problem. Try to ease the anxiety for your child. Put your own selfishness aside and stop the hate of the other parent for about 3 minutes.

Getting your child to tell the other parent what “they” want, when we all know it’s really what you want is damaging as well. It’s not an accomplishment to get a child to say something. It’s easy. What apparently is not easy is being a decent human being. Try it. You may just have a happier child and a happier life.

Matthew Thompson is a Child Custody attorney and advises his clients to do the right thing and what is best for the child EVERY time.

Follow the blog: #BowTieLawyer Visit the website: #Thompson Law Firm. You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Child Custody, Divorce, General Legal, Opinion

When Winning at all Costs is No Win!

02/03/2016 BowTieLawyer Leave a comment

Did you Win?

I am regularly asked how many cases have I won? Potential clients, non-lawyers, friends and relatives use this terminology. But, winning a case isn’t really about winning. It’s about mitigating damages and liability. It’s about preserving finances and relationships, if possible. A win is really knowing the best and worst case scenario and achieving what you aimed for or better.

When is a win not a win? When you leave a wake of havoc, of hate and a trail of tears.

Unfortunately, some lawyers take this tactic in Family Law. They believe scorched earth is the best and only approach. What they do not tell their clients, though, is that it is really only what is best for themselves, the lawyer. It is best for the lawyer financially, or perhaps they even have a personal animus against the other party or the the other lawyer.

Lawyers, in my experience, do not like to give the tough advice. That the fight is not worth it emotionally or financially. That if you win the other side ends up hating you and will spend the rest of their days waiting for you to mess up so they can pounce upon you.

The win at all costs approach results in frivolous filings, extreme delay, and angry judges. The overwhelming “win” results in an appeal, bar complaints and ultimately you may well lose in the end.

A Win is really not being unpleasantly surprised in the end result. A win equates with maintaining your relationships with your children and immediate family and having the means to provide a satisfactory life.

Matthew Thompson is a Divorce attorney and advises his clients when a win is a win and when it is not.

Follow the blog: #BowTieLawyer Visit the website: #Thompson Law Firm. You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

alienation, Child Custody, Divorce, Visitation

New Year, Same Bad Conduct.

01/29/2016 BowTieLawyer Leave a comment

Happy New Year? Rubbish…

Oftentimes we think a new year is a new beginning, or at least it should be. But, alas, people will constantly disappoint you…

More Bad Parenting:

Refusing to allow the other parent to SPEAK to the child. Literally interfering with phone calls, turning the phone off and lying about not knowing why they “don’t ever call.”

Calling when you know they are unavailable. Well, at least you called, right? We know when they are at work, or driving through the dead zone between here and Mobile. Call then, don’t leave a message.

Waiting until you find out the plans the other parent made and then making your own to conflict with them being able to pick-up or drop-off and still keep their plans. How clever.

The Other parent finding out the child is on an out-of-town trip with another family after the child has left. Pay no attention to Joint Legal custody requirements. It’s all about your convenience. It was a free trip. Last minute even. Who has the time to inform the other parent?

Not giving them gifts from the other parent. They took the time, effort and thought to provide a present and you forgot it in the trunk and, well, that’s not your problem…

Not listing the Other parent on school and medical forms. That will show them. They are not a “real” parent.

Read about Terrible parenting here, being Terrible in general here and Rotten parenting here.

Matthew Thompson is a Child Custody attorney and warns that Judge’s don’t appreciate this garbage.

Follow the blog: #BowTieLawyer #Thompson Law Firm. You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850- 8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms