Category Archives: Child Custody

Military Service and Child Custody

11/11/2013 BowTieLawyer Leave a comment

Many service members deal with serious family law issues which seem exacerbated by their military service. As if just working full-time and trying to balance life were not enough, being subject to deployment, frequent moves and dangerous activities add to making a bad circumstance worse. But, recently Mississippi has tried to make custody issues for military members a little easier.

Mississippi recently enacted a statute dealing with child custody when a parent receives temporary duty, deployment or mobilization orders. MCA 93-5-34, provides a fair, efficient and swift process to resolve custody matters when dealing with a military parent. Upon such circumstances of a custodial parent being “called up” the statute provides that the other parent will have custody, but that custody ends within 10 days of the former custodial parent returning from service.

Additionally, it provides that the deployed parent shall have reasonable access for phone and video visits. The deployed member may also delegate visitation to their own family members. These types of military custody cases receive priority by the Courts to be heard and the deployed parent may “attend” via affidavit or electronic means where possible.

Lastly, a parent’s deployment and subsequent custody change cannot be used against that parent upon their return. Mississippi has enacted sensible, fair custody legislation that protects military service members and their families.

Matthew Thompson is a Military Divorce Attorney in Mississippi. Happy Veteran’s Day and thank you to all you have served.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer. You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Child Custody, Divorce, Modifications

Jr. is 12+, he picks where he lives, right?… Child Preferences and the Law

11/07/2013 BowTieLawyer 3 Comments

If I had a nickel for every time a parent has said,

“Well, Jr. is (insert age) so I reckon he picks where he lives, right?”…

I’d have a wheel barrow full of nickels.

It’s true that a child may express a custodial preference if they are 12 years old or older, however that preference alone will not carry the custody issue. It is but one factor that the Court must consider when performing an Albright Analysis. Albright is the case that lists the factors the judge must consider when determining custody.

Said another way a 12-year-old does not get to pick and that be the end of the story. There are a myriad of cases where a child has stated a preference for one parent and the Court determined that the best interests of the child favored the other parent. One famous case involved a 14-year-old that wanted to live with Dad. Dad purchased him a 4-wheeler, let him have a TV in his bedroom and kept his “Adult” magazines around, easily accessible. Mom, on the other hand, made him eat his vegetables, do his homework, no TV in his room and forbade inappropriate materials. If you’re a 14-year-old male teen, who would you pick? The Court determined, after a factual analysis, that mom was better suited for the teen, despite his stated preference. This case was upheld by the appellate court as well.

So, a child 12 or older can state a preference, but it may not carry the day. The better course would be for mom and dad to resolve the custody visitation issues and prevent the child from being in that position. However, that advice is easy to say and very difficult to follow in certain circumstances.

Matthew Thompson is a Child Custody Attorney in Mississippi. While child preferences in a custody case matter, that alone will not support an initial custody decision, nor is the sole basis for a modification.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Child Custody, Crime, Divorce, Marriage, Opinion

The Adultery Train- All Aboard!

10/23/2013 BowTieLawyer 4 Comments

An affair plays a significant role in a large number of divorces. It is a train wreck to a relationship.

big_bad_locomotive_by_beezqp-d4mfi8t-1024x727 — Beezqp- “Big Bad Locomotive”

A sure-fire way to wreak havoc in a marriage is to have an affair. Mississippi law defines an affair or adultery as sexual intercourse, with a person of the opposite sex, not your spouse. However, due to the secretive nature of affairs you do not have to have an admission of guilt or pictures, though it helps. The ground can be proven through circumstantial evidence.

Upon a satisfactory showing of 1) inclination or infatuation, which can consist of cards, notes, emails, love letters, texts and phone records showing many calls; and 2) opportunity, which is the spouse and that other person alone together, be it in a car, house, motel, hotel, park or back alley, a Court can find that fault grounds exist. Due to this, even the whole “it’s only an emotional affair” and the “we didn’t have sex” may not be enough to stop the Adultery train from running over you.

So, why do people have affairs? They can be exciting, fun and pleasurable, at least for a little while. What leads to this? Sometimes the person is unhappy, dissatisfied, over-stressed, unloved, under-appreciated, or at least believe that they are.

The problem is the affair does not fix the problem. It only serves to make things worse. Because along with an affair comes new baggage. Guilt, secrecy, and the emotions of a third person are now commingled in your personal life. An affair not only hurts your spouse, but also you, your children and the other party. It has emotional consequences, financial consequences, custody consequences and legal consequences.

An affair is a Train wreck in the making.

Matthew Thompson is a semi-part-time Family Law Professor at MC Law and a Divorce Attorney encouraging you to avoid train wrecks!

Child Custody, Crime, Divorce, General Legal, Opinion

Beer Muscles- When exercising is not OK.

10/18/2013 BowTieLawyer Leave a comment

Habitual Drunkenness is not only a fault ground for divorce, but also leads to a wide variety of family law troubles.

Alcohol (aka:booze, beer, hooch, liquor, wine, drink, the bottle) is an easy vice to turn to, especially when dealing with the emotion and anxiety of family issues. However, it seldom salves and often makes things worse. Habitual drunkenness, that is consistent alcohol use and abuse to the extent that it cause the breakdown of the marriage, is grounds for divorce. Additionally, alcohol abuse can and will be used against you in a custody determination. I am not saying that you have to be a tee-total-er, but abuse of alcohol leads to poor judgement, decreased inhibitions and legal trouble.

Alcohol contributes to domestic violence incidents, accidents, and of course DUI. The risks always outweigh the rewards.

So do you have an alcohol problem? Well, there are a few ways to tell. Have you asked yourself if you have an alcohol problem? If so, you might. Can you go without drinking? If you suspect you have an alcohol problem seek help now. It will help your family later.

Matthew Thompson is a Family Law Adj. Professor at MC Law and a Child Custody/Divorce Attorney. Drink Responsibly! (if you do).

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law FirmYou may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Child Custody, Child Support, Crime, Divorce, Opinion

Never Do This in Court! (or This!)

10/14/2013 BowTieLawyer 2 Comments

Court. The most anxious, stress-filled, loss of control decision a person can make. Even with careful preparation it can be unpleasant. Without preparation it can be a nightmare!

So what should you not do in Court?

Don’t argue with the Judge. Even if the Judge is “wrong,” “mistaken,” or “backwards.” Leave the arguing to the attorney.
Don’t argue with your attorney. Short of catastrophic representation meltdown listen and heed your attorney’s advice.
Don’t argue with the other attorney. Just answer the questions asked, explaining if necessary. Personal jabs, smart-alleck responses and witty banter are not needed.

So that’s what you should not do, but what should you NEVER do?

Never give sassy responses to the Judge. This is different from arguing. Oftentimes the Judge will have questions for the witnesses. The responses and the manner given matter. For instance, in a hearing where both parents sought custody and child support, the father said that he did “NOT need ANY child support nor ANY money to care for HIS kids…” But, he then objected to having to pay any child support as he had limited income. The Court made note of his inconsistency.
Never criticize the other parent for conduct that you also do. On another occasion a parent was being especially critical of the other for “leaving” the children at day care all day and not picking them up until the “last-minute,” around 5:30. Well, this parent had also just testified they were self-employed and could get the children at any time, because his schedule was so flexible, but did not. This irked the Judge.
Never lie. (PERJURY) You will get caught. The truth is easy to remember. Remember, usually, it’s not the crime but the cover-up that gets you. The very affluent husband, with a great job, testified that he was unsure of his income, but knew his expenses down to the penny. He testified under oath that his expenses exceeded his income by over $10,000 per month. The problem? He had no debt. This situation of making $10,000 less than he was spending had been going on for months, if not years, but he always made payroll, carried no debt, had no loans and could not explain how this could be. Perhaps he had a money tree out back. The Judge imputed income and based his obligations on what he stated his expenses were and what apparently his income was.

Matthew Thompson is an Adjunct Professor- Domestic Relations at MC Law and a Family Law Lawyer. Don’t do these things in Court if you know what’s good for you!

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law FirmYou may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Child Custody, Child Support, Crime, Divorce, Modifications, Opinion

Drugs, Sex & Rock-n-Roll…No, Just DRUGS.

10/09/2013 BowTieLawyer Leave a comment

Drugs, it seems, are back on the scene in a big way. Habitual Drug use is a ground for divorce. Drug use can be a bar to custody. Drug abuse is a Crime and can lead to other troubles.

It’s more and more common for parties in family law cases to be drug tested. Urine, hair follicles, blood and even finger nails can be tested for drug use. Depending on the test, results can show drugs or alcohol in your system from 2 days ago up to 90 days ago. And testing “Hot” is not a good thing.

In your Family Law case the Court will put a lot of weight in a Failed Drug test when determining custody, visitation and credibility. While a Failed Drug test does not guaranty you will lose custody, it certainly does not help. It also can matter what type of drugs, how recent and quantities that the test results show.

Use, whether it is “recreational,” “just once” or “I never inhaled” can and will be used against you. Drug use can also be an element of child neglect/abuse.

Once, I was discussing visitation rights with a non-custodial parent. I made the comment, “Well, as long as you did not have a meth lab in the garage you have nothing to worry about.” The response, “What if I did?” “That’s going to be a problem…“

Now, all is not lost if you have used drugs or are using drugs, IF you STOP! Court’s like to see people “get their act together” “turn their life around” and “be productive members of society.” You can see your kids and you may even get or regain custody if you are doing all the right things.

Matthew Thompson is an Adjunct Professor teaching Domestic Relations and a Divorce Attorney. In the words of Nancy Reagan, “JUST SAY NO!”

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law FirmYou may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Child Custody, Crime, Divorce, General Legal, Marriage, Opinion

Don’t Date During your Divorce

10/07/2013 BowTieLawyer 3 Comments

“Dating during your divorce is akin to playing with matches and kerosene during a forest fire.” Matthew Thompson

It is commonly asked by clients, “Can I date others?” The short answer is NO. In Mississippi divorce there is no such thing as “legal separation.” You are married until you are divorced. That means either party could get “fault grounds” against the other at any time prior to the divorce being granted. In general however, it is just a bad idea.

Dating during your Divorce is a bad idea due to the following;

Dating involves feelings and emotions which can be misfiring at that point.
It involves money and expenses and Court’s look disfavorably of spending on boyfriends and girlfriends.
It could wreak havoc on a Custody case if that “new” person is either the wrong fit for your kids or a great fit, but it does not work out.
“Rebounds” tend to take a bad bounce.
It’s an easy target for your soon to be Ex and his attorney.
You may not really know the person you’re dating.

If you have to ask your attorney if it’s okay, it probably isn’t. Now, having said that, you are still allowed to have a “life.” You can go out in groups and otherwise socialize. Just be aware of your surroundings and actions because you never know who’s watching, waiting for you to mess up.

Matthew Thompson, a Divorce Attorney and Family Law Adj. Professor at MC Law, reminds you to do your best to prevent “forest fires!”!

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law FirmYou may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Child Custody, General Legal, Marriage

Name, Name, Name…Messiah to Martin to Messiah.

09/30/2013 BowTieLawyer 2 Comments

We’ve seen in the news a dust-up about a TN Judge that refused to allow parents to name their child “Messiah,” in fact changing the child’s name.

Mom and dad were in a disagreement over what to name the child, but ultimately agreed on the first name of Messiah and disagreed over the child’s surname (last name). The Judge crossed the line, however, when she changed the child’s first name over the parent’s agreement to Messiah and objection to any change of the first name. The Judge cited that the name was not in the child’s best interest and stated there is only one Messiah. The Judge also noted the name could be offensive to the religious community.

However, parents have a constitutional right to raise their children as they see fit, a constitutional right to privacy and a presumption that they are acting in the child’s best interests. That is not to say all parents do, but the State’s interest is primarily limited to the child’s last name. TN could determine the last name, which could either be the same as the mother’s or the father’s, but crossed the line when changing the first name.

The parents appealed the ruling and the matter was quickly reversed. Messiah, changed to Martin, is Messiah again. A correct legal outcome, regardless of how you feel about the name. In Mississippi, a child shall have the surname of the father, if known, regardless of the marital status of the parents. There is a provision, in the judge’s discretion, to deviate from the the surname of the father requirement, however there must be a compelling reason.

Matthew Thompson is a domestic relations counselor in the Magnolia State and encourages you to know your rights as a parent.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law FirmYou may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms