Tag Archives: custody

Child Custody, Divorce, General Legal, Opinion

Through the Eyes of Child; What Does Your Child SEE?

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One of the “rules” of Family Law is when you don’t know what the right legal answer is, do what is RIGHT and you will probably be okay.

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Doing what is right is not always easy, nor fun.  On several occasions I have had client’s faced with seemingly tough decisions or circumstances.  One client suspected the spouse of abusing illegal drugs.  They did not have direct proof, but knew of drug abuse in the past and had knowledge of very suspicious behavior lately.  Their idea was to create a circumstance where they would have the spouse under surveillance when the spouse was out buying drugs.  The problem was the suspected spouse would also have the child during that time.  I told them that you cannot put your child in that situation…

In other instances, parties have had the other spouse served while they had the children.  The problem with this is that it is scary and stressful for the child. Sometimes, it seems, having them served in this manner just cannot be avoided, but if it can, it should be.  (See my prior blog on service of process.

Think about your child,what they are experiencing and what they “SEE” before you go and do something to your soon-to-be ex-spouse.

Matthew Thompson is a Child Custody Attorney in Mississippi reminding you to SEE things through the eyes of your child.

Follow the blog: #BowTieLawyer Visit the website: #Thompson Law Firm  You may also contact Matthew with your family law case or question at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

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Child Custody, Divorce, Visitation

Raising Arizona…in Mississippi.

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Believe it or not Arizona is on the forefront of co-parenting and custody arrangements.  The plans and resources available to parent’s do a better job of serving the best interest of the child over some other State’s one-size-fits-all approach to custody and visitation!

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The Arizona Supreme Court website has a “Planning for Parenting Time – Arizona’s Guide for Parents Living Apart” which has numerous schedules, options and ideas for parents with children who are no longer living together.

There are schedules that are age-dependent, meaning the custody times are specifically catered to the age and needs of the child, from infant to the teen years.  There are schedules for when mom and dad are “high conflict,” suggesting the exchanges be at school or daycare so mom and dad don’t actually see each other.  There are schedules for when the parents live great distances from one another and for when they are in the same community.  There are more 1) traditional schedules, 2) week-on, week-off, 3) 5-2-2-5, 4) 3-4-4-3, and 5) provisions for a unique and completely custom schedule based on what you need.

If your goal is truly the best interest of the child, take a page from the Arizona parenting guide and consider what is best for your child when determining custody  Every other weekend is slowly going by the wayside.

Matthew Thompson is a Child Custody attorney and encourages solutions specific to you and not what your neighbor’s friend’s cousin got.

Follow the blog: #BowTieLawyer Visit the website: #Thompson Law Firm. You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Child Custody, Child Support, Divorce, Visitation

A Parent’s #1 Obligation

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A parent has a moral and legal duty to promote a healthy, affectionate relationship between the child and the other parent!

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What?  You justify your conduct by saying, “I am not bad-mouthing him.”  But, just not bad-mouthing him is not enough.  You have an affirmative duty to promote a good relationship. (with rare exceptions for the health and safety of the child.)

Encourage, promote and truly desire a good relationship between your child and the other parent.  Your child will benefit!

Matthew Thompson is a Family Law & Divorce Attorney and reminds you that a child with two parents that get along and are involved is better than the alternative.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm. You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Child Custody, Child Support, Crime, Divorce, General Legal, Opinion

How to be a TERRIBLE Person. (11 specific ways you can be mean & hateful.)

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In my profession I get to see a lot of what not to do almost, every day; from videos, texts, and emails to actions and sometimes inaction.

So, I have compiled a list of what terrible people do.  If you want to be terrible do these things, in no particular order.

  • Curse and scream at your spouse, as loud as you can, as often as you can.
  • Curse and scream at your children.
  • Make false abuse claims.
  • Lie about the false abuse claims even when it’s clear they are false.
  • Bad-mouth your child’s other parent to the child.  (Hey, it’s the truth, right!)
  • Interfere with their time with the child.  Just do it.  Sure it hurts your child too, that’s what makes it even more terrible.
  • Abuse your spouse or child. (Any form – all are terrible, some more-so than others.)
  • Refuse to support your family.
  • File suit when your ex paid 5 days late, even though they told you. It’s the principal, right?
  • Threaten to make public private images. (and mean it when you say it, at least in the moment.)
  • Refuse Christmas visitation.  Just because.

There you have it, 11 mean, hate-filled things that you can do to be terrible.

“Oh, and if you don’t want to be terrible don’t do these things.” – Matthew Thompson

Matthew Thompson is a Family Law Attorney in Mississippi and tries not to do terrible things or give terrible advice.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer . You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

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alienation, Child Custody, Child Support, Crime, Divorce, General Legal, Modifications, Opinion, Visitation

The DIRT!** (24 Dirty Deeds in Family Law)

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One of the unique things about my profession is that I routinely get paid to discuss the embarrassing, wild and sometimes just ignorant things people do.

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The DIRT is/are the things that the other side says you did, even if you did not do them; substance abuse, crimes, non-payment, hateful things…

What cannot be stressed enough is that you have to be honest and forthright with your attorney. If you hold something back and do not disclose the full story it can come back to bite you. Being bitten could mean not getting custody, having to pay attorney’s fees, going to jail or any combination of these.

What are Examples of Dirt you ask?

  • 1) Instances of substance abuse,
  • 2) DUIs,
  • 3) Public Drunks,
  • 4) Child Endangerment charges for DUI with the children present,
  • 5) Arrests for assault,
  • 6) Battery,
  • 7)Crimes of moral turpitude or
  • 8) Violence,
  • 9) Substance abuse, even if not caught,
  • 10) Knowing you would test “hot” or “positive” for an illegal drug or
  • 11) Prescription drug for which you do not have a prescription.
  • 12) And not telling your attorney any of the above is dangerous, even if they don’t ask. Sometimes we don’t know or think to ask if you
  • 13) Are on probation from any crime.
  • 14) Is there a no contact Order against you,
  • 15) Domestic violence charges pending,
  • 16) Active warrants for your arrest,
  • 17) Suspended license.
  • 18) Are you under investigation?
  • 19) Meth lab in the garage,
  • 20) Not to mention having a paramour, an affair,
  • 21) Multiple affairs,
  • 22) Paying for your mistresses’ vacation,
  • 23) Buying the mistresses’ child a car, or
  • 24) Expending large sums of money on frivolous things.

These are just 24 examples of DIRT that I saw…last week. These dirty deeds may be done dirt cheap, but it’s going to cost you to clean it up!

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and can only attempt to clean up the DIRT that the client admits.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

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Child Custody, Child Support, Crime, Divorce, General Legal, Marriage, Modifications, Opinion

What’s the Right Answer? (Family Law Conundrums)

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Basic Family Law 101: (in most instances)

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If you don’t know what the “right” legal answer is, do what’s “right,” and you’ll be fine.

-Matthew Thompson

Matthew Thompson is a Family Law Attorney in Mississippi.  That is all.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Child Custody, Child Support, General Legal, Modifications, Visitation

Churchill Wisdom; On Perseverance

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Never, never, never give up.  

– Sir Winston Churchill

I recently concluded a 3 year, 4-day, custody trial.  The matter began 3 years ago on an emergency basis, removing custody of a child from one parent, due to their conduct, and placing custody with the other parent.

The matter took three years because it was in two different Courts; Youth Court and Chancery Court.  There was a lawyer change about a year into the matter and it took some time to have the matter transferred from one Court to the other.

There were Orders regarding pyschological evaluations and parenting classes and requirements of completing those processes.  Also, the delay benefited the party that had emergency custody, so having it concluded sooner was not a huge priority.  It also took a long time to get to the trial setting. It was set months in advance but due to the Court docket being backed up it was not quick.  Also, when the matter was not finished on the day set for trial, you do not just go back the next day, you get another setting months down the road.

This, however, is by no means a standard time frame, but it does happen. During the three years both parties wavered on pursuing the matter to the end, on compromising and just giving up.  But, perseverance prevailed.  Justice prevailed and the Court ultimately ruled on Custody and what was in the best interest of the child.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and can attest that perseverance can win the race.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@wmtlawfirm.com.

Child Custody, Child Support, General Legal, Opinion

War Stories; How NOT to testify (grandmother edition)

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War Stories are the fun, awful, tough and unique occurrences that lawyers and parties in litigation get to experience and live to tell about it. At water coolers and break rooms throughout the world lawyers regale anyone who will listen about that time they…(this series will include a few of my own).

Facts: This was an initial Child Custody case, which means the Court must consider the Albright Factors. Dad had temporary custody due to prior child neglect allegations against mom. Mom was required to pay child support pursuant to this Order. Mom called her mother (Grandmother) to testify to corroborate that mom is good, dad is bad, and custody should be with mom.

On direct examination, that is when mom’s attorney was questioning grandmother, she did fine. She said mom was good, dad was bad for reasons including; he was not around and did not support the child, and that the child should be with mom.

On cross-examination, that is when I get to ask questions, the tone changed. From the jump Grandmother was defensive and combative. This was a mistake on her part. She should have stayed calm and exuded confidence, not anger. Even if she had to fake it.

Upon questioning about the neglect allegations grandmother downplayed them as a misunderstanding and had a story which completely excused mom’s conduct. The problem was there had already been 3 prior witnesses which contradicted this, one of whom was mom! Certainly they had to have had a discussion prior to court.

Next, grandmother took dad to task for “not supporting” the child, but her only “proof” was anecdotal. Nonetheless, she concluded he was no good because he was not supporting them and she knew this because mom told her so. Grandmother changed her tune about a parent being no good for not supporting the child however, once my questioning revealed mom had not paid child support in months, though ordered. It was different for some reason, but she could not be explain how.

Lastly, Grandmother had no real complaints about dad’s care-giving the last several months when he had custody and reluctantly admitted the child was doing well. She was also extremely evasive about mom’s new beau and that person’s involvement with the child. It was obvious she was trying to avoid giving that testimony.

Grandmother should not have testified. She added nothing and ended up undermining mom’s case. The only way to have known this would have been to thoroughly prepare her for direct and cross-examination and taking the time to view the case from both parties’ perspectives.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and assesses your case from your perspective, as well as how the other side may approach it.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer 

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

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