All posts by BowTieLawyer

Matthew operates the Thompson Law Firm, pllc, a Mississippi based Family Law firm emphasizing; Divorce, Child Custody, Child Support, Modification, Contempt and Appeals, handling family law cases throughout Mississippi. (601) 850-8000 Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms www.BowTieLawyer.ms
Child Custody, Crime, Divorce, Marriage, Opinion

How Do You Tell When a Lawyer is Lying?

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“His lips are moving.”

Perjury has been blogged about.

Never lie. (PERJURY)  You will get caught.  The truth is easy to remember.  Remember, usually, it’s not the crime but the cover-up that gets you.  The very affluent husband, with a great job, testified that he was unsure of his income, but knew his expenses down to the penny.  He testified under oath that his expenses exceeded his income by over $10,000 per month.  The problem?  He had no debt.  This situation of making $10,000 less than he was spending had been going on for months, if not years, but he always made payroll, carried no debt, had no loans and could not explain how this could be.  Perhaps he had a money tree out back.

Lying to your kids has, as well.

It never fails.  One of the aggrieved parties to a divorce tells the dirty details to the child regarding the other parent.  This is never appropriate or “ok.”  Never. Never to a young child. What about when….? No. Never.

But that parent, with their righteous indignation tells me, or testifies, “I do NOT lie to my child?”  My response?  “Well, what about the Tooth Fairy?“

The Top 5 Lies of Divorce clients are here.

5.  Lies about Income.

4.  Lies about their role within the Home.  

3.  Lies about Other Marital Fault.

2.  Lies about Value$.

1.  Lies about Adultery.

Matthew Thompson is a Divorce Attorney in Mississippi and encourages potential clients to tell your lawyer the truth!

Follow the blog:#BowTieLawyer Visit the website: #Thompson Law Firm  You may also contact Matthew with your family law matter or question at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Divorce, General Legal

Book of Sins; A Detailed Accounting of all of Your Wrongdoings…and Other Things to do for a NOT Healthy Recovery

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Who wrote the Book of Love…er…Sins? 

http://www.tamarajelaca.com/art-books/

Do you have a Book of Sins?  I have learned a new term.  “Book of Sins.”  This book is a recounting of every wrongdoing perpetrated by that lousy ex of yours.

It includes every text, email, photo, posting, phone record(s), and listing of lies that your sorry, no good ex spouse did, said, lied about and tried to get away with.

This book is brought out at nearly every post-divorce opportunity. Phone call about the kid’s dentist appointment?  Remind her of the Book of Sins.  School Program?  Well the program should include a reference to the Book.  What? He’s apologized and you’ve “forgiven “him?? Well that doesn’t mean you can’t throw the Book at him.

The Book of Sins is apparently a real way some persons attempt to deal with divorce.  While evidence gathering before a divorce and record keeping after one have a purpose, a Book of Sins and continual reference to same, even years later, does not serve a legitimate purpose.  It is not healthy.  Burn the Book.

Matthew Thompson is a Divorce Attorney in Mississippi and suggests you burn the Book of Sins.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

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Child Custody, Divorce, Opinion, Visitation

Going to Bat for Your…Ex!? – Things Great Parents Do Whether they Like it or Not.

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Ex-spouses.  The scourge of happy families.

Despising your ex is a “fundamental right” that most divorcees have earned. Usually, about half of the time, the ex deserves it. However, there are some involved who do not.  The children.

Promoting and encouraging a good relationship between your ex and the children is usually a very good thing.  You should do it.  How, you ask?

Go to Bat for the Other Parent.

If the child indicates they don’t want to go to visitation or that they would rather go to Jenny’s birthday, don’t acquiesce.  Tell them how important it is to go see the other parent. Tell them how much that time means to the other parent. Tell them how much fun they will have.  Even if you don’t believe it.

Think about if the roles were reversed.  Jenny’s birthday is not that important to your child. It’s just another school friend’s birthday. Time with the Other Parent is Priceless.

Here are some other tips on NOT being a Terrible Parent:

Signs of Terrible Parenting.

How to be a Terrible Person.

And, here’s the Best Thing You Can do for Your Child!

Matthew Thompson is a Child Custody  Lawyer in Jackson, Mississippi and goes to bat for his clients.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law FirmYou may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

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Divorce, General Legal, Irreconcilable differences, Opinion

BlackMail is Legal in Divorce – The Law in Mississippi; Promoting Fights Since 1976

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Mississippi law provides for parties to gain a divorce through one of two methods; 1) Agree to the Divorce and all issues, called an Irreconcilable Differences Divorce, or 2) pursue a Fault Based Divorce granted due to the other party’s misconduct. That’s it. Mississippi does not have a true NO FAULT divorce process.

So,what happens if you cannot agree and do not have grounds?

Divorce Blackmail

In the mid 1980’s this issue was pointed out by the Mississippi Supreme Court.

       “Prior to 1976 mature and responsible people who found their marriages irretrievably broken were offered by our law absurd choices…the complaining spouse had to choose between outright perjury and hoping that the chancellor would not strictly enforce the standards of proof legally required to establish one of the twelve grounds for divorce. The other choice…the ‘knock down, drag out’ fight to which the adversary system invariably leads…frequently creating more problems than are solved. Divorce had become a degrading, dehumanizing experience.”

Gallaspy v. Gallaspy, 459 So.2d 283 (MS 1984). Justice James Robertson, Concurring Opinion

       …further improvements in our law are needed. As enlightened and desirable as was the enactment of the Irreconcilable Differences Act in 1976, the job has not yet been completed…[the] Irreconcilable Differences Act–it facilitates, even encourages, financial blackmail…the chancery court has not authority to grant a divorce…unless the parties have reached an agreement…the spouse wanting the divorce or feeling that he or she must obtain a divorce is subject to financial blackmail. A party without fault grounds and no mutual agreement has only two options; (1) knuckle under and accept less than favorable financial terms or (2) go to court and try to obtain a contested divorce and an accompanying alimony and support award, when, as she and her lawyers surely must have known, she really did not have “grounds.” Id.

Justice Robertson actually proposed adding a 13th fault ground of Irreconcilable Differences, which if proven would allow the Court to award an ID divorce to one party, even over the objection of the other party and would allow the Court to rule upon the support issues.

However, Mississippi law actually perpetuates Blackmail.  If your spouse won’t agree and you don’t have fault grounds then you are STUCK.

There have been a number of bills proposed to end this divorce conundrum, but so far none has gained any traction.  Let me know your thoughts.  Do you support allowing for a true No Fault divorce, or an irreconcilable differences divorce after a period of separation?

Matthew Thompson is a Family Law attorney and is in favor of amending the Irreconcilable Differences divorce statute.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer 

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Divorce, Marriage, Opinion

When to Have an Affair.

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Affairs can be exciting, secretive and scandalous…

jesadaphorn/ freedigitalphotos,net

This excitement is short-lived.  The secret too, is soon out. Finally the scandal hurts more than just the perpetrators, but also their families.  Affairs, actually, are usually disasters, depressing and not worth the effort. During an affair the participants are focused on themselves. This tunnel vision leads to neglect of those other persons in their life, which actually makes those relationships worse.

There is an ebb and flow that is true in all of our interactions with other human beings. The time you are spending with that other person is less time that you are spending with your family, focusing on your work, and even yourself.

Additionally, the fall out from the affair is “self-inflicted” injury and injures all parties involved.

So, when is the right time to have an affair?  Never.  There is no right time to have an affair.  

Matthew Thompson is a Mississippi Divorce Lawyer and reminds you of what Nancy Reagan has said since the 1980s, “Just Say no.”

Follow the blog:#BowTieLawyer Visit the website: #Thompson Law Firm  You may also contact Matthew with your family law matter or question at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Child Custody, Child Support, Divorce, Marriage, Opinion

Judges Love This – Making a Comeback; Turning Adversity into a Positive

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I’m not going to go all Tony Robbins on you, but Judges love a comeback story.

Adversity is a part of life.  Oftentimes it is self-inflicted. I see a lot of clients that do things that are against their own best interests and it is a safe bet that at the next hearing they will have to answer questions about it.  However, just because you did some things you should not have does not mean you should give up and wallow.

I represented a client who was an alcoholic.  This person would drink themselves into oblivion and was an abusive person under the influence.  As expected it lead to trouble in the marriage and home-life and with work.  It impacted every aspect of their life.  He was sued and the wife sought temporary custody and sought to get temporary support.  He was served and summoned to a court date.  We showed up and the other attorney was expecting a fight.

We had a conference with the Judge and the other attorney told the Court all of the awful things my client does while under the influence. The Judge, so used to hearing two or three sides to every story, asked for my take.  I advised the Judge my client had a serious problem with alcohol and when under the influence acted in an inappropriate and unjustified manner, however when sober was a great father, worker and person. That the real issue was addiction and that my client needed help.

The Judge and the other side were surprised by the candidness displayed.  The Judge told a story of her own relative who struggled with alcohol abuse and that she wished he would have had the opportunity for help. The Judge stated that if he admitted a problem that she would assist in getting him help and would not hold it against him.

He was committed to an alcohol treatment program and his support obligations were held in abeyance pending completion.  It was exactly what was needed.

You can turn negatives into positives, you just have to stop doing the negatives…

Matthew Thompson is a Mississippi Divorce Attorney and will try to help you turn adversity into advantage.

Follow the blog:#BowTieLawyer Visit the website: #Thompson Law Firm  You may also contact Matthew with your family law matter or question at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

Divorce

Happy Thanksgiving!

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Appeal, Divorce, Marriage

Mississippi Same-Sex Marriage Ban Struck Down

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“Down goes Frazier!” – Or rather Mississippi’s ban on same-sex marriage.

On Tuesday, Federal District Court Judge Carlton Reeves did two things simultaneously; 1) He struck down Mississippi’s Constitutional ban on same-sex marriage paving the way for same-sex couples to finally marry in Mississippi…,but not so fast. 2) Judge Reeves also issued a stay for two weeks to allow the State of Mississippi time to appeal the ruling to the 5th Circuit Court of Appeals.

This means the MS Constitutional ban is no longer valid, however enforcement, or rather same-sex marriage, is put on “hold” in this State pending the 5th Circuit ruling.  So more of the same for now.

The 5th Circuit has arguments set for early January regarding cases out of Texas and Louisiana over same-sex marriage prohibitions.  The 5th Circuit’s eventual ruling will apply to Texas, Louisiana and Mississippi.

Stay tuned.  New developments will be blogged as they occur.  The next round will likely be in a few months.

Matthew Thompson is a Mississippi Family Law Attorney, Adjunct Professor of Law in Family Law and is closely following these pending cases and the impact they will have on marriage in Mississippi.

Follow the blog:#BowTieLawyer Visit the website: #Thompson Law Firm  You may also contact Matthew with your family law matter or question at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

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