Category Archives: divorce

Signs of Terrible Parenting

In case you are wondering, “Am I being a terrible parent?” Ask yourself these questions, if you answer yes, you may well be parenting terribly.

  • Do you withhold financial support from your child?
  • Do you discuss grown-up issues with your young child?
  • Do you degrade the other parent to your child?
  • Do you take the position Easter is not a “holiday”?
  • Do you prevent your child from seeing the other parent?

A “Yes” to any of these does not require that you are a terrible parent, however your parenting as to that issue may be terrible. So, you ask, how do I not parent terribly?

  • Pay your support- if you have the means go beyond.
  • Do not discuss grown-up issues – the child does not need to know the details of the divorce.
  • Do not criticize the other parent – I agree they deserve it, but the child does not.
  • Easter is a holiday. It just is.
  • Allow your child to see the other parent – exceptions for dangerous circumstances only.

Matthew Thompson is a Child Custody Lawyer in Mississippi and reminds you to not be a terrible parent.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer 

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

How to Be a Reasonable Client.

On the heels of “Signs of an Unreasonable Client” comes the counter, so you know how to be a reasonable client.

  1. Listen to your Attorney. You hired them, now listen.
  2. Ask if you Don’t Understand. We can sometimes fall into the trap of speaking in legalese and assume you get it you aren’t indicating otherwise.
  3. Pay Your Bill.  That is how attorneys make money and all attorneys are not as rich as they want you to think.
  4. If you Have an Issue with us, Let us Know.  Don’t tell someone else about your concerns and not allow the attorney a chance to address it.
  5. Don’t Ignore your Attorney.  One of the worst things you can do is go off the grid and not communicate.
  6. Don’t Text Incessantly. It’s great for “running 10 minutes late” or “the date is Aug. 4,” otherwise call or email.
  7. Don’t Email when a Call is Better. Somethings you just have to talk about.
  8. Don’t Abuse the Cell Phone.  Do NOT abuse the cell phone.

Matthew Thompson is a Divorce Lawyer in Mississippi and encourages all clients to be reasonable.

Follow the blog:#BowTieLawyer Visit the website: #Thompson Law Firm  You may also contact Matthew with your family law matter or question at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

 

Don’t Want Things to Get Worse? Don’t do Something to Make Things Worse

Want things to get worse? Do something worse!

http://www.rogerebert.com/far-flung-correspondents/a-marriage-made-in-hell

In family law it is often desired by a party to do something to get back at the other spouse.  The awful soon-to-be-ex did something first that was mean, so they want retribution and to do something meaner.  Usually this is a very bad idea. Two wrongs don’t make a right and it may well get you into trouble.

John and Jenifer were married. John had an affair with Jane. Jane was married to Jim.  So, guess what Jenifer did? She had an affair with Jim!  It did not make things better…

There’s a reported case where the soon-to-be-ex-husband threw all of the wife’s clothes in the driveway, squirted them with lighter fluid and lit them afire.  This conduct did not make things better.

Unless you want to end up in the War of Roses, stop doing things to make things worse.

Matthew Thompson is a Divorce Attorney in Mississippi and advises all of his clients to abstain from doing things to make things worse.

Follow the blog:#BowTieLawyer Visit the website: #Thompson Law Firm  You may also contact Matthew with your family law matter or question at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

 

Lying Eyes & Other Signs of Lies and the People That Tell Them.

If you’ve ever been involved in a family law case then you’ve dealt with someone lying.

Clients, witnesses and even lawyers sometimes lie.  It could be a little white lie or a huge whopper. A former CIA officer said to watch out for these cues that you might be being lied to;

  • The Eyes Tell the Tale.  When asked a question the witness looks up, closes their eyes or looks down, especially on a question they should know.
  • Shielding the Face.  When speaking the person have their hand in front of their eyes or mouth.
  • Verbal Answer/Body Language Disagree.  The best example of this was when the deponent was asked if she was having an affair.  She said, “No,” but shook her head Yes.  When confronted with this she spilled the beans.
  • The Delayed Response.  Some things you should not have to think about.
  • Fidgeting.  Messing with your hair, your cup, or your pen when answering.
  • Nose Grows.  Think Pinocchio.  Very rare*

Want to know more about lies and the people that tell them?  Try these;

Matthew Thompson is a Divorce Attorney in Mississippi and advises you to NEVER lie while under oath.

Follow the blog:#BowTieLawyer

 You may also contact Matthew with your family law matter or question at (601) 850-8000 

The First Phone Call to the Attorney; What to Know?

The first step is always the hardest!

cuteimage/ freedigitalphotos.net

When you call a Family Law Attorney for the first time there are some basics that are pretty universal.  Be ready with this information.

  • Your full name and that of your spouse/defendant
  • Whether anything is on file in any Court
  • Critical deadlines, trial dates, hearing dates, etc…
  • Who the attorneys are, if any
  • Who the Judge is
  • What Court you are in, if so
  • What County is home for you
  • Date/Place of Marriage
  • Date/Place of Separation
  • Ages of children
  • Job description and approx. income
  • Whether it will be contested or Agreed

These are the basics that any family law practitioner is going to need to do a conflicts check and to do a proper evaluation of your case.

Matthew Thompson is a Divorce Attorney in Mississippi and encourages potential clients to educate themselves and know their stuff!

Follow the blog:#BowTieLawyer Visit the website: #Thompson Law Firm  You may also contact Matthew with your family law matter or question at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

 

War Stories; A “Bump” in the Road

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Client sabotages own case.  Story at eleven.

FACTS:  A mother lost custody, temporarily, due to being arrested for driving on a suspended license.  The father was given the child and while mom was in jail he filed a fault based divorce, sought custody and had her served.  Mom was finally released and began the process of regaining custody.  Mom filed an Answer and a claim for custody herself.

At a temporary hearing, which is a legal band-aid to address custody and finances, mom presented her case.  Upon being cross-examined there were numerous questions about alleged drug use.  Well, fortunately, mom had been thoroughly interviewed and prepared by her lawyer.  Her ONLY dirt was the suspended license.

Mom denied the drug allegations as laughable.  Some of mom’s financial records were introduced that showed her in some shady parts of town at unseemly hours.  This was shown through ATM transactions.  However…

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“Should I take my nose ring out?” a.k.a. Attire for Court

Recently I was asked about appropriate attire for Court.  Specifically, I was asked about the propriety of wearing a piercing in Court.

“Should I take my nose ring out?”

While dress codes in Couimgres.jpgrt are not what they used to be, you still should dress appropriately for Court.

What is proper attire?

  • conservative/church attire
  • slacks/dress pants
  • button-down/collared shirts
  • suit
  • appropriate dresses

What is not proper?

  • shorts
  • t-shirts
  • sleeveless shirts
  • short dresses/skirts
  • gaudy jewelry
  • hats

…so, should you take your nose ring out?                 

“Yes, yes you should.”

Matthew Thompson is a Litigation Attorney in Mississippi and while you may not lose your case because of your attire or appearance, everything you can do to help should be done.

Follow the blog:#BowTieLawyer Visit the website: #Thompson Law Firm  You may also contact Matthew with your family law matter or question at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

 

Child Testimony in Court

Whether a child should testify is a struggle in every instance when it arises.  I have previously blogged on the law, the Jethrow standard that the Court applies in determining the process of a child testifying.  (Click here).  Today’s is a practical view on how the Court conducts children testifying in a Civil case.

So, how does child testimony work?  Ultimately, it depends on the Judge.  I have seen the following;

1)  The Judge clears the Courtroom of all persons except the Judge, the Court Reporter and the child.

Here the Judge does the questioning.  The Judge is trying to determine the child’s truthfulness, their intellectual capacity for the retaining and reporting the information sought and whether is admissible and relevant.  This process takes as long as the court deems necessary.  I have stood in the hall for an hour while the Court conducts the interview.  Upon the Court concluding, the parties and lawyers are brought back in and the Judge summarizes the child’s testimony.  There may or may not be an opportunity for questioning.

2)  The Judge takes the child and the Court reporter to his/her chambers (office).

Again the Judge does the questioning, but it is in a less intimidating setting.  The judge’s office is usually much more “familiar” and personalized than the Courtroom.  Judge’s do this to put the child more at ease.  The relative same process of above is used, just in a different location.

3)  The Judge, the lawyers, the child and Court Reporter go into the Judge’s chambers.

Here the Judge let’s the lawyers do the questioning.  Now, the Judge is making sure that the lawyers maintain a respectful and appropriate tone and the child is not subject to interrogation or cross-examination in the true sense of the word, but the child is responding directly to the lawyers.  The Judge determines what is relevant and admissible in all instances.

And finally,

4)  The child takes the witness stand and is questioned by each lawyer and possibly the Judge, in the presence of the parents.  For a very young child this procedure will not be used.  For an older child, say 14 and up, this is more common.

Ultimately, the age of the child, the issues at hand and the wishes of the parent’s are the deciding factors in how the child testimony is handled.  The famous quote from the Jethrow case is;

“We reiterate that parents in a divorce proceeding should if at all possible refrain from calling any of the children of their marriage, of tender years at least, as witnesses, and counsel should advise their clients against doing so except in the most exigent cases. The reason and wisdom behind this precaution need no amplification. We also hold, however, as we must that no parent can be precluded from having a child of the marriage in a divorce proceeding testify simply because of that fact.” Jethrow v. Jethrow, 571 So.2d 270, 274 (Miss. 1990).

Matthew Thompson is a Child Custody Litigation Attorney in Mississippi.

Follow the blog: #BowTieLawyer  #Thompson Law Firm  You may also contact Matthew with your family law case or question at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

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