Category Archives: General Legal

Divorce, General Legal, Marriage, Opinion

“What Rhymes with Hug Me?” (hey, hey, hey)

08/07/2013 BowTieLawyer Leave a comment

Robin Thicke has a song out called Blurred Lines.

In the song he sings about sending mixed signals and how a response intended to mean one thing can be interpreted or mean another to the receiver.

Are your communications with your spouse doing the same thing?

Communication is critical. It’s critical in a healthy relationship and it’s critical in the aftermath. I have seen many, many post separation communications be misinterpreted and then used against the sending party. Email and text messages do not connote tone. Glib comments, being cute or even a smart aleck can easily be inferred or not.

Also, too much communication leads to mixed signals, mixed emotions, false hope and opportunity for your words to be used against you. Usually, I recommend limited communications and that those be about the children or emergencies, or course. Sometimes, however, I recommend no contact. You hired attorneys, let them do it.

Don’t blur the lines.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and while Blurred Lines may be a catchy song, blurred lines of communication can lead to trouble.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

alienation, Child Custody, Child Support, Crime, Divorce, General Legal, Modifications, Opinion, Visitation

The DIRT!** (24 Dirty Deeds in Family Law)

08/02/2013 BowTieLawyer 1 Comment

One of the unique things about my profession is that I routinely get paid to discuss the embarrassing, wild and sometimes just ignorant things people do.

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The DIRT is/are the things that the other side says you did, even if you did not do them; substance abuse, crimes, non-payment, hateful things…

What cannot be stressed enough is that you have to be honest and forthright with your attorney. If you hold something back and do not disclose the full story it can come back to bite you. Being bitten could mean not getting custody, having to pay attorney’s fees, going to jail or any combination of these.

What are Examples of Dirt you ask?

1) Instances of substance abuse,
2) DUIs,
3) Public Drunks,
4) Child Endangerment charges for DUI with the children present,
5) Arrests for assault,
6) Battery,
7)Crimes of moral turpitude or
8) Violence,
9) Substance abuse, even if not caught,
10) Knowing you would test “hot” or “positive” for an illegal drug or
11) Prescription drug for which you do not have a prescription.
12) And not telling your attorney any of the above is dangerous, even if they don’t ask. Sometimes we don’t know or think to ask if you
13) Are on probation from any crime.
14) Is there a no contact Order against you,
15) Domestic violence charges pending,
16) Active warrants for your arrest,
17) Suspended license.
18) Are you under investigation?
19) Meth lab in the garage,
20) Not to mention having a paramour, an affair,
21) Multiple affairs,
22) Paying for your mistresses’ vacation,
23) Buying the mistresses’ child a car, or
24) Expending large sums of money on frivolous things.

These are just 24 examples of DIRT that I saw…last week. These dirty deeds may be done dirt cheap, but it’s going to cost you to clean it up!

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and can only attempt to clean up the DIRT that the client admits.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

Child Custody, Child Support, Crime, General Legal, Modifications, Visitation

It’s Never What you Think!

07/31/2013 BowTieLawyer 1 Comment

As an attorney that practices exclusively family law I am routinely posed with questions and scenarios of one person doing everything right and the other everything wrong. However, when I start digging and asking the right questions I find that “It’s Never What you Think!”

Recently, I was asked by a friend to speak to friend about her potential case. The potential client had “done everything right,” but the ex and his attorney were “out to destroy her” and would not let up. She was at wit’s end. As I was speaking with her I was asking about custody, visitation and support issues.

Lawyer: “You are current on your support, right?”

Client: “Yeah…” (said with hesitation)

Lawyer: “That did not sound convincing”

Client: “Well, I paid for my kids medical and activities and he has a great job and doesn’t NEED it.”

Lawyer: “His job doesn’t really matter as far as support goes…what were you ordered to pay?

Client: “$475.00 per month.”

Lawyer: “When was the last time you paid $475.00?

Client: “Years.” (said with hesitation)…”He didn’t need the money.”

This was not an instance of having “done everything right.” Why the ex waited years to pursue it is a mystery, but he nonetheless has the right to.

In another instance, a “good father” just wanted reasonable visitation. I asked, as I always do,”What is the dirt on you?”

The DIRT is/are the things that the other side says you did, even if you did not do them; substance abuse, crimes, non-payment, hateful things.

In this instance “the dirt” was long ago, recreational drug use and just some routine fussing and fighting. I said in jest, “Well, so long as you didn’t have a meth lab in the garage…” “Actually, it was.” There’s your dirt.

So to all of you well-meaning helpful friends, you are NOT getting the full story. And to all of you eager attorneys seeking to fight injustice and righting the wrongs of others, get the full story. It’s Never What you Think!

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and only believes half of what he sees and even less of what he hears.

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General Legal, Marriage, Opinion

Happy Anniversary; The “Secret” to Wedded Bliss.

07/29/2013 BowTieLawyer 1 Comment

My parents recently celebrated their 45th wedding anniversary!

As I was inquiring about how long it “felt,” I was struck by the fact it was literally longer than a lifetime for my two brothers and me. I was asking dad about his “advice” and he recounted that in those 45 years that mom “never forget anything.” Mom laughed out loud. That’s LOL for the texting generation.

What I did NOT get were the clichés of never going to bed angry, that they just grew apart, or that us moving out(the kids) left them with nothing in common. So what did I takeaway from that? Keep a sense of humor. It was a big part of my life growing up. Laughing at yourself and others, primarily others. The cliché that did work and that is still working “laughter is the best medicine.”

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Child Custody, Child Support, General Legal, Opinion, Visitation

Paternity; Determining Baby Daddy

07/22/2013 BowTieLawyer 2 Comments

Paternity…Filiation…Who’s Your Daddy, whatever you call it, it’s the process where the Court determines who the biological father is and what his rights and obligations are.

Mississippi Law provides a number of statutes dealing with the Law on Paternity. Miss. Code Ann. 93-9- 1, et seq.

93-9-7 provides that the father of a child born out-of-wedlock is liable to the same extent as the father of a child born of lawful matrimony. The father can be liable for the “reasonable expenses of the mother’s pregnancy and confinement, and for the education, support, maintenance and medical expenses related to the child.” Additionally, a father can be liable for past support and maintenance for a period of one year prior to the filing of the paternity action. The father may also be ordered to pay the mother’s reasonable attorney fees.

Either the mother, the father, or any public authority chargeable by law with the support of the child may bring a paternity suit. This is what allows DHS to pursue these matters. The statute provides that once paternity is established the child shall have the surname of the father.

These actions may be brought in Chancery Court, Circuit Court or County Court, though most often are brought in Chancery.

Any agreements between the mother and father must be approved by the Court to be enforceable. A voluntary acknowledgement of paternity by a father is subject to a one year limit to challenge paternity. After one year, the only way to set aside a paternity Order is to show fraud, duress or material mistake and that you are not the father. Be careful about this. I always recommend a DNA/blood test, even if you “know.” If you are wrong you may still end up on the hook financially.

Also, if you find yourself in a paternity suit be sure to file for a determination of custody and visitation. DHS will not always do this and you could end up with financial obligations and no specific rights to see your child.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and encourages you to hire an attorney if you find yourself in a paternity case.

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You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

Divorce, General Legal, Marriage, Opinion

Want Unconditional Love? Get a Puppy.

07/12/2013 BowTieLawyer Leave a comment

A happy, healthy husband-wife relationship is a wonderful thing. Though some would argue, increasingly rare.

Due to various reasons that relationship can break down. Recently, I was inquiring about the reasons for the breakdown of a marriage and it came down to the feeling of the lack of unconditional love (UL).

Upon some additional questions I learned that UL, in this instance, meant something to the effect of, “I can do whatever I want, and you HAVE to love me…” Or stated in less offensive terms, “while I may not always put you first, I NEED to always be put first.”

I thought that’s not really UL. Then I thought, how can a relationship on this Earth between a husband and a wife, or any relationship between consenting adults really be one based upon UL? If it really was UL, would that be a healthy relationship? Would the receiver of UL fully appreciate what they are getting? Would the giver of UL ever be satisfied?

UL is what a puppy gives. ALWAYS happy to see you. Always eager to please. Cannot wait to be with you again and cute as the dickens. But even puppies get tired and poop on the floor…

Want the closest thing to unconditional love? Get a puppy. Want a healthy relationship? It takes work, mutual companionship and a desire to make it last.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

Child Custody, Child Support, Divorce, General Legal, Modifications, Visitation

Riding the Wave – “Coping” with Family, Law and Family Law

07/08/2013 BowTieLawyer Leave a comment

One of the best pieces of advice is to “ride the wave.” In family law, such as life, adversity is a given. How you respond is the key.

How you choose to deal with that adversity will directly contribute to the results you get. Oftentimes it is a common reaction to fight fire with fire, and we all know the eye for an eye sentiment, but that may not be the best response. I have previously blogged on dealing with stress and uncertainty. This one is a little different. It is not so much how to cope, but to try to use the adversity to your advantage.

A great example was when I was faced with a young father being sued for an increase in child support. He had experienced an increase in income and was really starting to enjoy life. The ex sued him and he viewed this as ‘just his luck.’ I explained that she may be entitled to a child support increase, that he was paying a very low amount from a previous order, that some time had passed since last being in Court and that an increase was due. As I discussed his situation he disclosed some frustration with the visitation schedule. How his new job, while paying well made the current schedule difficult to work and the ex was not too easy to get along with. I told him that since we are “going to court” that we should seek a visitation modification. He did not want to make things worse. I told him it would not. Ultimately, an increase in support was negotiated along with a visitation schedule change that allowed him more time.

He rode the wave, sure it cost more money, but that is what the law requires once you subject yourself to the Court system. He used the adversity to get a better result.

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You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

Bow Tie, General Legal, Opinion

Thompson named Adjunct Professor at Mississippi College School of Law.

07/05/2013 BowTieLawyer 2 Comments

Matthew Thompson, founder of Thompson Law Firm, pllc, has accepted a position as an Adjunct Professor at Mississippi College School of Law. He will be teaching Domestic Relations, a 3-hour course, to rising 2L and 3L law students. Thompson has been in the private practice of law for the past 8 years, with an emphasis on Domestic Relations.

“I was honored to be asked by the law school and am excited to be teaching the family law class.” – Matthew Thompson

Thompson will continue to operate Thompson Law Firm, pllc.

Matthew currently serves on the Board of Directors for Mississippi Legal Services Corporation and the Mississippi Volunteer Lawyers Project. Matthew is President of the Madison County Bar Association, Chairman of the Legal Committee in his neighborhood owner’s association, U5/6 Soccer Commissioner with the South Madison County Soccer Organization, Coach of the Thompson Law Firm FireAnts and BlueBirds soccer and t-ball teams, and serves on the Madison County Community Advisory Group.

You may contact Matthew at (601)850-8000 or Matthew@BowTieLawyer.ms

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.