Category Archives: Opinion

Bow Tie, divorce, Opinion

Happy National Bow Tie Day!

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August 28 is a day of note.  It is National Bow Tie Day!

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“Bow Ties are believed to have originated among Croatian Mercenaries during the Prussian wars of the 17th century.  These Croat mercenaries used a ‘scarf’ around the neck to tie the opening of their shirts.  This was soon adopted by the French upper classes in form of the cravat. From there the neck-ware flourished in the 18th and 19th centuries.” http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bow_tie

“It is uncertain whether the cravat then evolved into the bow tie AND necktie, or whether the cravat gave rise to the bow tie, which in turn led to the necktie.” Id.

I celebrated the day by wearing a bow tie to Court.  It probably had no impact on the outcome, but the judge made a comment about it.  He has “worn one once or twice,” but has not mastered tying one, just yet.

The bow tie is frequently a topic of conversation.  I was recently told that only 2 types of people wear bow ties; 1) law professors and 2) clowns.  The person saying this, I think, was trying to make a mild insult.  They asked which was I.  I responded with “law school professor.” It’s true.

I have previously blogged on “Why the Bow Tie.”

I know what you are thinking,

“Who are some Notable bow tie wearers?”

  • Abraham Lincoln
  • Franklin Roosevelt
  • Theodore Roosevelt
  • Winston Churchill
  • John Paul Stevens
  • Albert Einstein 
  • Sigmund Freud
  • Humphrey Bogart
  • Frank Sinatra
  • Charlie Chaplin
  • Orville Redenbacher
  • Bill Nye
  • James Bond
  • Barney Fife
  • Donald Duck
  • The Cat in the Hat

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and prefers bow ties to regular neck ties.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms

divorce, General Legal, Opinion

Why I HATE Being a Lawyer.

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I don’t really hate being a lawyer.  Most days I enjoy it.  It can be rewarding emotionally, financially, even spiritually, but…

pastemagazione.com/ Better Call Saul

being a lawyer has its downsides.

  1. For one, we have to deal with OTHER LAWYERS.  Other lawyers do things differently than you do them.  They are slow, they don’t do what they say they will, they tell you things that are just wrong and they give their clients crummy advice.
  2. All of our CLIENTS HAVE PROBLEMS.  That is why they are seeing you.  Lawyers purposely make other people’s problems their own!
  3. All Lawyers are NOT RICH.  What?!! They never told you that before law school.  Lawyers struggle to find their niche’, find their market and some just don’t like being lawyers.
  4. JUDGES.  Judges judge you.  They judge me.  That’s their job, but some let it go to their head.  A Judge’s attitude alone can make or break a Court experience, even with the same outcome.
  5. CHURCH COMMITTEES.  Being a lawyer gets you the hot seat for every church, social, civic and community committee in known existence.  You are automatically the chairperson and the questions never stop.
  6. DOCTORS.  Doctors don’t like lawyers.  Sure, I have some doctor friends, but I have to tell them that I DO NOT sue doctors. (That’s not entirely true, as I do sue doctors that cheat on their spouses…)
  7. We have to CHARGE $.  Lawyers cannot afford to take your case for free.  (see #3, above).  I tell potential clients that I cannot afford to do it for free and that if they find one that will you better watch out for getting what you “paid” for.  Most people deserve to have a lawyer. Most lawyers deserve to be paid.
  8. FRIENDS that just have 1) question. It will only take a minute…
  9. NOT KNOWING THE ANSWER.  Of course lawyers don’t know every answer to every possible question.  I tell people when I don’t know something.  Yes, I am still a lawyer.
  10. MANY CLIENTS.  To be a successful lawyer you must have clients.  Because of this you must have multiple clients.  The downside is sometimes a client, a person you genuinely care for and want to help, has to wait on you.  This is tough.  It is a balancing act.  You, as a lawyer, cannot be in 2 places at once.  Most clients understand. Some do not.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and enjoys being a lawyer most days.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@wmtlawfirm.com.

divorce, General Legal, Marriage, Opinion

Red Flags of an Affair

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Warning signs to look for…

Warning signs that may show that your significant other may be seeing another!

  • A Secret Cell Phone.  They have a 2nd phone without a need or the other phone is secret.
  • Change in Attire.  The spouse is dressing in trendier clothes or “younger” or more “revealing” clothes.
  • New Undies.  Provocative undergarments appear that you don’t see in use.
  • Working out.  A sudden change in their workout regimen, without a scare from the Dr. and it’s not New Year’s Day.
  • Body Grooming.  Manscaping, or new cologne, perfumes, etc.
  • Body Augmentation.  Having lifts or lipos.
  • Longer Work Hours.  Having to work late, a lot more often, and out-of-town travel when they previously did not.
  • Unexplained Absences.  Going to the store for some milk and being gone 6 hours.
  • Bad On-Line Habits.  Surfing at all hours of the night, deleting the browser history.
  • FaceBooking Old Flames.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and admits while these signs can certainly exist with nothing going on, that if 3 or more are happening Watch Out!

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@wmtlawfirm.com.

divorce, General Legal, Marriage, Opinion

“What Rhymes with Hug Me?” (hey, hey, hey)

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Robin Thicke has a song out called Blurred Lines.

In the song he sings about sending mixed signals and how a response intended to mean one thing can be interpreted or mean another to the receiver.

Are your communications with your spouse doing the same thing?

Communication is critical.  It’s critical in a healthy relationship and it’s critical in the aftermath.  I have seen many, many post separation communications be misinterpreted and then used against the sending party. Email and text messages do not connote tone.  Glib comments, being cute or even a smart aleck can easily be inferred or not.

Also, too much communication leads to mixed signals, mixed emotions, false hope and opportunity for your words to be used against you.  Usually, I recommend limited communications and that those be about the children or emergencies, or course.  Sometimes, however, I recommend no contact.  You hired attorneys, let them do it.

Don’t blur the lines.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and while Blurred Lines may be a catchy song, blurred lines of communication can lead to trouble.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

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alienation, Child Custody, Child Support, Crime, divorce, General Legal, Modifications, Opinion, Visitation

The DIRT!** (24 Dirty Deeds in Family Law)

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One of the unique things about my profession is that I routinely get paid to discuss the embarrassing, wild and sometimes just ignorant things people do.

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The DIRT is/are the things that the other side says you did, even if you did not do them; substance abuse, crimes, non-payment, hateful things…

What cannot be stressed enough is that you have to be honest and forthright with your attorney. If you hold something back and do not disclose the full story it can come back to bite you. Being bitten could mean not getting custody, having to pay attorney’s fees, going to jail or any combination of these.

What are Examples of Dirt you ask?

  • 1) Instances of substance abuse,
  • 2) DUIs,
  • 3) Public Drunks,
  • 4) Child Endangerment charges for DUI with the children present,
  • 5) Arrests for assault,
  • 6) Battery,
  • 7)Crimes of moral turpitude or
  • 8) Violence,
  • 9) Substance abuse, even if not caught,
  • 10) Knowing you would test “hot” or “positive” for an illegal drug or
  • 11) Prescription drug for which you do not have a prescription.
  • 12) And not telling your attorney any of the above is dangerous, even if they don’t ask. Sometimes we don’t know or think to ask if you
  • 13) Are on probation from any crime.
  • 14) Is there a no contact Order against you,
  • 15) Domestic violence charges pending,
  • 16) Active warrants for your arrest,
  • 17) Suspended license.
  • 18) Are you under investigation?
  • 19) Meth lab in the garage,
  • 20) Not to mention having a paramour, an affair,
  • 21) Multiple affairs,
  • 22) Paying for your mistresses’ vacation,
  • 23) Buying the mistresses’ child a car, or
  • 24) Expending large sums of money on frivolous things.

These are just 24 examples of DIRT that I saw…last week. These dirty deeds may be done dirt cheap, but it’s going to cost you to clean it up!

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and can only attempt to clean up the DIRT that the client admits.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

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General Legal, Marriage, Opinion

Happy Anniversary; The “Secret” to Wedded Bliss.

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My parents recently celebrated their 45th wedding anniversary!

As I was inquiring about how long it “felt,” I was struck by the fact it was literally longer than a lifetime for my two brothers and me.  I was asking dad about his “advice” and he recounted that in those 45 years that mom “never forget anything.”  Mom laughed out loud.  That’s LOL for the texting generation.

What I did NOT get were the clichés of never going to bed angry, that they just grew apart, or that us moving out(the kids) left them with nothing in common.  So what did I takeaway from that?  Keep a sense of humor.  It was a big part of my life growing up.  Laughing at yourself and others, primarily others. The cliché that did work and that is still working “laughter is the best medicine.”

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer 

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Child Custody, Child Support, General Legal, Opinion, Visitation

Paternity; Determining Baby Daddy

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Paternity…Filiation…Who’s Your Daddy, whatever you call it, it’s the process where the Court determines who the biological father is and what his rights and obligations are.

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Mississippi Law provides a number of statutes dealing with the Law on Paternity. Miss. Code Ann. 93-9- 1, et seq.

93-9-7 provides that the father of a child born out-of-wedlock is liable to the same extent as the father of a child born of lawful matrimony.  The father can be liable for the “reasonable expenses of the mother’s pregnancy and confinement, and for the education, support, maintenance and medical expenses related to the child.”  Additionally, a father can be liable for past support and maintenance for a period of one year prior to the filing of the paternity action.  The father may also be ordered to pay the mother’s reasonable attorney fees.

Either the mother, the father, or any public authority chargeable by law with the support of the child may bring a paternity suit.  This is what allows DHS to pursue these matters.  The statute provides that once paternity is established the child shall have the surname of the father.

These actions may be brought in Chancery Court, Circuit Court or County Court, though most often are brought in Chancery.

Any agreements between the mother and father must be approved by the Court to be enforceable.  A voluntary acknowledgement of paternity by a father is subject to a one year limit to challenge paternity.  After one year, the only way to set aside a paternity Order is to show fraud, duress or material mistake and that you are not the father.  Be careful about this.  I always recommend a DNA/blood test, even if you “know.”  If you are wrong you may still end up on the hook financially.

Also, if you find yourself in a paternity suit be sure to file for a determination of custody and visitation.  DHS will not always do this and you could end up with financial obligations and no specific rights to see your child.

Matthew Thompson is a family law attorney in Mississippi and encourages you to hire an attorney if you find yourself in a paternity case.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

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divorce, General Legal, Marriage, Opinion

Want Unconditional Love? Get a Puppy.

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A happy, healthy husband-wife relationship is a wonderful thing. Though some would argue, increasingly rare.

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Due to various reasons that relationship can break down. Recently, I was inquiring about the reasons for the breakdown of a marriage and it came down to the feeling of the lack of unconditional love (UL).

Upon some additional questions I learned that UL, in this instance, meant something to the effect of, “I can do whatever I want, and you HAVE to love me…” Or stated in less offensive terms, “while I may not always put you first, I NEED to always be put first.”

I thought that’s not really UL. Then I thought, how can a relationship on this Earth between a husband and a wife, or any relationship between consenting adults really be one based upon UL? If it really was UL, would that be a healthy relationship? Would the receiver of UL fully appreciate what they are getting? Would the giver of UL ever be satisfied?

UL is what a puppy gives. ALWAYS happy to see you. Always eager to please. Cannot wait to be with you again and cute as the dickens. But even puppies get tired and poop on the floor…

Want the closest thing to unconditional love? Get a puppy. Want a healthy relationship? It takes work, mutual companionship and a desire to make it last.

Follow the blog: BowTieLawyer Visit the website: Thompson Law Firm

You may also contact Matthew with your family law case, question or concern at (601) 850-8000 or Matthew@bowtielawyer.ms.

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